Tuesday Tastings

Buckle in, as we'll be moving pretty quickly through today's syllabus....

Drip, Drip - The Olympics morphed into an Agatha Christie movie so seamlessly that I hardly noticed:

Just days after Oosthuizen added his name to a lengthening list of golfers who have

opted to give the Rio de Janeiro games a miss, world No 20 Schwartzel has followed suit.

"I am sad and disappointed that several top players have withdrawn from the Olympic Games in Rio," he said. 

"I was sorry to hear that Louis Oosthuizen and Charl Schwartzel have withdrawn their names from consideration. 

"I would have given anything to play in the Olympics. South Africa had a great team, but now obviously, it will not be as good."

Well, Gary, we're sorry for your loss, but Shack might have had a point with this barb:

Charl Schwartzel is telling South African Olympic team captain Gary Player he can take his Olympic dreams and live them out through someone else, joining fellow countryman Louis Oosthuizen in announcing on the eve of more rigorous drug testing that he's skipping the Rio games. His reasons, if you care, were not clear.

If you grow up as a golfer you wouldn't likely have Olympic dreams, for obvious reasons.  And I'd go further, if you grew up as a South African golfer, you might carry a grudge against an organization that excluded your countrymen for so long...

But this seems overly personal:

Yes, but I'm not sure golf could survive another rally-killing major win by the South African. One was enough.

Wow!  Did Charl dis you somehow, Geoff?  And as I recall, that was a pretty exciting Masters... 

Switching gears, golf.com has an item of click-bait titled, "Tour Responds to Criticism of Doping Efforts", but one needs to read halfway through the short piece before reaching this:

Tour spokesman Ty Votaw declined to respond to Pound's comments or speak to the veracity of Pound's account of his conversation with Finchem, but Votaw did defend the Tour's anti-doping efforts.

Well, I'm certainly satisfied with that....OK, there's a trifle more:

"Since 2008, we have had a comprehensive and robust anti-doping policy, have conducted thousands of tests of our athletes since that time and have had a couple of suspensions announced, all of which demonstrates that while we continue to believe we have a clean sport, there have been instances in which players have made mistakes and have been sanctioned," Votaw said.

Hmmmm...a couple of suspensions?  Well, maybe if they're big-time names?

Under the Tour's anti-doping program, three golfers have been suspended for using PEDs — Doug Barron (2009), Bhavik Patel and Scott Stallings (both 2015) — but WADA chief David Howman told GOLF.com in 2015 that "there are gaps in the program, and that means someone might not be tested or might not be detected."

Now, as I reacll, Stallings admirably turned himself in for a petty violation, but suspending Bhavik Patel no doubt requires large, brass-plated ones... Pretty much confirms Commissioner See No Evil's reported comments to Dick Pound.

Oakmont On The Horizon - Shack has some good fun with the mangled transcript from the U.S. Open Media Day at Oakmont, including this:

A transcript of today's program will be available a little bit later this afternoon.

And please see a member of the compromised staff if you have any questions about media service or operations at the U.S. Open proper.

Let he who has not typoed cast the first stone... This was somewhat interesting:

For the 10,000, roughly 10,000 players that are going to try to qualify for this championship, what are they going to expect in terms of golf course setup in June? What's interesting is, a lot of sameness. And I say that because from 2007 we are playing it the same yardage. Every hole is exactly the same yardage as 2007.

The same fairway widths and contours as we played in 2007. In fact, these are the same fairway widths and contours the members here at Oakmont have been playing for years and years. They're the same grass heights from 2007. The same green speeds as 2007. The same general hole locations as 2007. Same bunkering and the same wonderful course conditioning that John Zimmers and his staff have done.

As for the inevitable Fox question, well....

Q. Mike, a year now in with Fox Sports, what are your thoughts about Fox as a partner and presenting the U.S. Open and all of your USGA championships.

DIANA MURPHY: Let me comment on that. Thank you for the question.

[Reports confirm Mike was not treated for any bruises obtained as the President dove for the microphone. Go on...]

We're delighted to have Fox as our partner. We have really had a wonderful experience with them in year one, recognizing it was their first year, and I know how excited they are to get out there beginning next month with our Four‑Ball at Winged Foot and I think many of them are on the course today having a great time with the course and playing it and also doing some video.

But I think that their innovation, their technology, their enthusiasm and energy and bringing golf to the world has been remarkable. And we're looking forward to continuing that partnership nor many years.

But if they were so good, why the major personnel changes?   Oh, never mind... Ryan Herrington has posted five things we learned from media day, including this one of personal note:

You should root for local native Nathan Smith to get through sectional qualifying.

The 37-year-old from Pittsburgh is among the most accomplished career amateurs of the last two decades, winning five USGA titles, including last year’s inaugural U.S. Amateur Four-Ball title. He’s also played on three U.S. Walker Cup teams and competed four times in the Masters. There is, however, a hole on Smith’s resume: He has never qualified to play in a U.S. Open in more than 20 tries.

“I’ve been close a lot, but I’ve never made it,” Smith said. Among the most notable was in 2007, the last time the Open was held at Oakmont. Hopeful to qualify for his hometown event, Smith excitedly took a phone call informing him that, after being an alternative out of local qualifying, there was a spot for him in a sectional qualifier.

For those with long memories, we're big Nathan Smith fans because of this very special day.   

Here's my recollection of my conversation with Kent before the event:

ME: Do you know who you're paired with?

KENT:  Some amateur named Nathan something...

ME:  Smith?  You're playing with Nathan Smith?  Sit down young man, that's not just any amateur.

 Oh, and that Woods guy is registered....

Back to Ryan for this:

The USGA gets cut more slack from players when the U.S. Open comes to Oakmont. 

There’s an old axiom that Oakmont members never tire hearing repeated: When the USGA comes to town, the club has to top off the rough and slow down the greens. It’s an exaggeration—we think—but one that speaks to the reputation that precedes the course.

As Davis noted: “I really do believe this is the one golf course in the United States that, if we had to make a call one to two weeks before the U.S. Open and say, we're in a pinch, can you host the national Open Championship, this place could do it.”

Though strictly speaking, that's not something we needed to learn.  There's an old story froma prior Open at Oakmont in which a player complains about the speed of the greens, to which a club member responds along the lines of, "That's nothing.  You should have seen how fast we had them for the Member-Guest."

How hard is this golf course?  Well, there's the eighth hole:

Famous for playing 300 yards during the 2007 U.S. Open, the 8th hole at Oakmont

Country Club could match that distance again in 2016. USGA Executive Director Mike Davis said as much Monday from U.S. Open Media Day at the course. 

"As we said in 2007, before everybody thinks we have lost our marbles making a par-3 300 yards, when you go back and you read historically about what HC and WC Fownes wanted, they designed that hole to be a driver, 3-wood hole," Davis said. "The only way to get it to that way now days is to get something back there. 

"And what's so neat about that design is, the 8th is one of the largest greens at Oakmont and candidly it's one of the flatter greens there. And you can land, I think there's a cross bunker there the Sahara bunker that if you fly, you got about 43 yards to bounce your [shot], before you even get to the green, where it's nice and firm, slight downhill slope. So, you could play even if you were playing it 300 yards, you might be able to hit it 250, 260 in the air and have it bounce up there. So it's great strategy, but it's nonetheless a tough hole."

I'm a Mike Davis fan, but I'm not sure that that's exactly the correct definition of "strategy".

Short Takes -  

ESPN Mainstay Mike Tirico Leaving To Join NBC - Tirico is an uninspiring, if inoffensive presence on the tube.  But he's versatile, and has grown to love the Open Championship.  With Dan Hicks calling swimming in Rio, he's likely to be tasked with keeping Johnny on point, an unappreciated talent of Hicks.

Sorry: #SB2K16 Is Not Something To Be Lauded - If you're not familiar with Snapchat lingo, that's the moniker for the Fowler/Spieth/Thomas/Smylie sponsored vacation that featured heavy drinking combined with topless and shoeless golf.  It's definitively not my thing, and if it's yours you might be happier reading another blog, but do give Shack's rant a read.  There's been pushback for sure....

The unrestrained joy of this announcer's albatross call will make your Monday - I'm actually more a fan of Hend's non-reaction, but your mileage may vary.  Hend went on to win the event, so for once it really mattered...

I came as close to seeing an albatross as I likely ever will on Sunday.  I went out late in the day with our male professional staff and on our 12th hole the aforementioned Kent St. Charles hit a 4-iron from 232 yards that drew towards the pin and rolled by on the high side by not more than a couple of inches.  Wow!

The man who invented the yardage book - It's actually someone with whom you're already familiar, but it's David Owen, so what are you waiting for?

Note to Readers - This afternoon, Employee No. 2 and I head the Hipster Central, a/k/a Portland OR.  There's an adorable little ten month old to whom we need to pay homage, or at least to let her spit up on us a bit.  The laptop is coming with, but I've no clue as to whether any significant blogging will ensue.  But do check back early and often...