Tuesday, March 31, 2020

Tuesday Tidbits

March is renown for coming in like a lion, and departing like a.... well, obviously this year it's no lamb.   It so happens that per the Chinese calendar it's the Year of the Rat.  We'll go with that for now...

Schedule Madness - Shack has a long post up on the jigsaw puzzle that is our golf calendar.  I'm not sure there's anything above and beyond what we had yesterday, but he does cite this reasonable source:
McDowell said it’s a question of prioritizing the schedule whenever the PGA Tour restarts its season and finding ways to play the game’s biggest events in a sensible way. 
“I can’t imagine the jigsaw puzzle the European Tour and the PGA Tour have on their hands,” he said. “If we could be back to playing golf around June you could argue four solid months for the [Ryder Cup] qualifying process. Could you pick two teams of 12 that could reinject some adrenaline back into golf, then I’d be fully supportive of it.” 
However, McDowell said finding the proper way to fit those puzzle pieces together shouldn’t necessarily be contingent on playing the Ryder Cup as scheduled, with the Masters and PGA Championship already postponed by the pandemic. 
“To me the major championships take priority over the Ryder Cup,” McDowell said. “It’s only going to be a viable opportunity if we feel good about the qualifying process and we feel the teams are legitimate. It’s such a difficult question.”
Jay Monahan hardest hit.  I'm not sure that Graeme has all that much juice, but it seems a rather obvious priority, no?  Of course The Ulsterman elides the fact that several of the majors have their own qualification process....

Obviously Mr. Monahan will not shed a tear at March giving way to April, as he pretty much squandered his reputation for a mess of pottage during the former.  He'll be arguing against the other five families (plus a certain Mr. Pelley) to maintain a spot for his events, but also will have a rearguard action (presumably) of picking certain events (cough**FedEx Cup** cough) over other events and their sponsors.  Should be entertaining....

Current Conventional Wisdom has the PGA Championship actually benefiting from their move to May:
First up is the PGA of America. Because its PGA Championship has already been
postponed, it has a jump-start on finding a new date. Though the heads of golf's governing bodies are in coordination with one another, there remains a degree of competition and self-interest. In short, although TPC Harding Park is a venue where a tournament can be played well into the fall, the PGA of America is targeting the late July, early August date vacated by the Olympics.
The byline on that Golf Digest item is amusingly "ByJoel BeallBrian Wacker".  My kingdom for an ampersand....

The astute reader will note that the PGA was hardly the first major to be postponed...  But also, San Fran in late July seems awfully optimistic.  Goeff links to this Global Golf Post item that seems to have been bypassed by facts on the ground, but can't we all agree that this is about as unimportant as it gets:
Television factors into the equation as well, with the behemoth that is the NFL seemingly still ready to re-emerge in September. CBS, which televises the Masters, and Fox Spots, which airs the U.S. Open, would have serious scheduling issues.
It would actually be interesting to see how a Fall Masters would fare against the NFL.  Those that remember the history of that Fox-USGA contract know that the USGA has long coveted the Masters' ratings.  This could be the year in which they achieve them....

But doesn't it seem like this is way overly-optimistic:
The intention to return in mid-May at Colonial was echoed in this Daniel Rappaport story about the PGA Tour’s loan program for players based on their FedExCup status.
Rushing back fr a dead spot on the schedule seems.... ill-advised.  I don't mean to be harsh, but nobody will mourn missing Colonial for a year.  

Random Acts of Kindness - Setting aside the aforementioned tone-deaf PGA Tour Commish, the golf world seems to have its priorities in order.  First this:
Add Augusta National to the growing list of golf clubs giving back during the coronavirus crisis. The club is donating $2 million toward coronavirus relief efforts, Augusta chairman Fred Ridley announced Monday. 
“It is our hope these gifts will help address the many challenges brought about by the coronavirus throughout the City of Augusta and the greater region,” Ridley said in a statement. “We believe Augusta National has an important responsibility to support and protect the community who has so generously and consistently supported us for many years.” 
A pair of local organizations working to stop the spread of the virus will split the gift equally. Augusta University will receive $1 million to expand testing capabilities in the area, while another million will be donated to the Central Savannah River Area’s COVID-19 relief fund.
And this:
Millions of Americans are out of work due to the coronavirus pandemic, and among
those are thousands of caddies who work at courses that are now closed. It appears loopers at Riviera Country Club in Pacific Palisades, Calif., are about to get a boost, thanks to one of the club's most high-profile members. 
Larry David, creator of Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm, and friend Lloyd Braun have started a GoFundMe to raise money for caddies at the storied club. As of Friday afternoon, the fundraiser has generated more than $100,000 in six days. NFL quarterback Tom Brady is among the list of donations (TB12 gave $2,000, according to the list of donations), as is social-media star Bob Menery, and David himself, who appears to have given $5,000. Michael Yamaki, Riviera's corporate officer, confirmed that the GoFundMe appeared to be legitimate. Riviera, No. 23 on Golf Digest's most recent ranking of America's 100 Greatest courses, has hosted the PGA Tour's Genesis Invitational for years. The club is closed as a state-wide shelter-at-home order has been issued, with courses in California closed as they are seen as non-essential, though in states like Connecticut, they are allowed to operate.
And via Geoff, the previously unknown to me Summit Golf Brands:
Q: So a part of you is busy with that and part is surely paying attention to what’s
happening in the world. At what point did you realize you might be able to help? 
A: A week ago Thursday, we got an email through our customer-service department from one of our customers who had suggested that we could make masks for emergency-care workers. I spent the weekend developing a first prototype. We got on a conference call on Monday to discuss, then looped in our Wisconsin warehouse team who would be responsible for executing. I sent my first prototype out to them. Then through our in-house embroidery and heat-sealing machinery developed two prototypes that we then took to the Wisconsin Emergency Management Agency.
They own Fairway & Green and Zero Restriction...  Keep those names in mind for later, and buy something from them if you can.

The folks at Pinehurst put on their thinking caps and auctioned off some unique experiences:
• The Dornoch Cottage Ultimate Trip—Three rounds of golf plus two nights for your foursome in Donald Ross’ home off the third green at Pinehurst No. 2. 
Play all 10 Pinehurst Courses—Two players get a six-night stay in the Carolina Hotel, mirroring a real-life escape trip by Barstool Golf’s Sam Riggs Bozoian.

Play No. 4 with Gil Hanse—The man who redesigned the course will join your foursome.

Reserve The Cradle for half a day—Play your own music, play in 10-somes, play holes backward. “It’s all your call because the course is yours.” 
Create your own beer—You’ll collaborate with the head brewer from Pinehurst Brewing Company to develop your own brew, from planning the recipe, brewing, naming and drinking.

Pick the range at Maniac Hill—Hop in the range picker and dodge balls from menacing sharpshooters at Pinehurst’s practice facility.
Is Maniac Hill still used?  I believe I have a print of this iconic photo of Bobby Jones on Maniac Hill:


Not sure of the year, but that's Horton Smith watching on the right.  This update just in:
UPDATED, March 29: In a little more than 24 hours, More than $126,000 had been raised and six additional items were put online, including a round of golf at Pinehurst No. 2 with Bill Coore, who along with Ben Crenshaw helped restore the course ahead of the 2014 U.S. Open, and a visit to the future site of Pinehurst No. 10.
After 9/11, Pine Valley auctioned of a couple of Mondays of tee times.  We were in Scotland, but if anyone notices such a thing this time, kindly drop me a note.

Today In Lists - Did someone mention Bobby Jones?  We've had a run on the Jones boy recently, and this one comes courtesy of Jim Nantz.  Here's Jim's intro:
In the summer of 2018, after a round of golf at The Country Club in the Pepper Pike suburb of Cleveland, I spent some time perusing the numerous artifacts on the walls of the cavernous locker room. Not far from the original match-play bracket of the 1935 U.S. Amateur played at “Country” was a reproduction of what appeared to be an 18-hole scorecard. But looking more closely, I saw it wasn’t a scorecard at all, but a list titled, “Bobby Jones’ ‘ideal’ course.”
So, without further ado, here is the great man's routing:


Wow, that's not at all what I'd have expected....His reverence for the Old Course is widely known, so the prevalence of holes therefrom is no surprise.  In fact, Geoff had this quite as his blog header yesterday:
“If I had ever been set down in any one place and told I was to play there, and nowhere else, for the rest of my life, I should have chosen the Old Course at St. Andrews.”
-- Bobby Jones
But it's the holes he chose that surprise.  No. ten and thirteen notably.  But the Old Course only has two Par-3's, and our Bobby seems to have picked, dare I say it, the wrong one?  No. 11, the iconic Eden Hole, is the far more famous and revered, serving as a Macdonald template.

And the choices on his home turf are equally odd.  The sixth?  The fourteenth?

At first I thought perhaps he had issues with Macdonald's work, but once we make the turn we quickly play holes from both The National and from the Lido, perhaps the greatest golf course no one ever had a chance to see.   At some point I'll do a post on the Lido, and bore you all to tears...

Jim has a brief precis of each of the holes chosen, and shares some of my quibbles.  It's delightfully eccentric, so of course I love it.

Another curious list, this time of his ten favorite golf courses, comes from Greg Norman:


My curiosity here was weather he would penalize those places associated with personal hearbreak, and the answer seems to be a resounding No.  Shinny, The Old and Augusta National all broke the man's heart, but he seems to not take it personally.

But do we think he's showing off in citing Machrihanish?  It's a personal fave, so perhaps I should be more charitable?  Yeah, I know, why start now?

In Which I Get Mine - In sharing longtime friend Al Z.'s reading suggestions yesterday, I tweaked him about using his newfound free time to proof my silly musings.  The indignities I'm willing to absorb just to keep you folks entertained....  Here is Al's response verbatim:
Scott,

I took a quick read of your latest blog. A few things jumped out at me. But fear not, I wasn't harmed, my reflexes are every bit as sharp as when I was 70 and I was able to duck. Speaking of which, Happy Birthday.

I no longer subscribe to your RSS feed, so I don't have a handy text version of your post to mark up. I trust you can search.

Search for "Whats App". The correct name is WhatsApp, with no space,

Search for "assumg". Change to assuming.

Search for "perhaps its been over". Change its to it's.

Search for "finally got b****". Somehow you managed to insert a link into the middle of "slapped".

Search for "stand still". Standstill is one word.

Search for "loan fro now". Fix it.

Search for "its members needs". Change members to members'

Search for "toruney". Change it to tourney.

Search for "perhaps they don't". Capitalize the P.

Search for "Some day, when". Someday is one word.

Search for "Waybac Machine". Change Waybac to Wayback.

Search for "Nick O'hern". Does he really spell his name with a lower case H?

Search for "occured". Change to occurred.

Search for "girlfriends lapdog". Change girlfriends to girlfriend's.

Search for "hit an upon a". Change it to something coherent.

Search for for "wait til spring". Change til to 'til.

Search for "schadnefreudalicious". Change to "schadenfreudalicious".

Search for "poobahs". Change to poohbahs.
Le Sigh!

I think I could get off on a technicality on his penultimate correction, given that it's not even an actual word.  Of course, you'll quickly note that my error was in that portion that is an actual word....

Secondly, I'll cop only to a nolo contendere on the Waybac Machine.  My recollection was that Rocky and Bullwinkle spelled it without a "k" at the end.  Alas, per the authoritative Wikipedia, my vindication is at best partial.

But I'm a bit miffed that he unsubscribed from my RSS feed, as I only had the one subscriber...

In search of amusement?  How about the best Unplayable Lies typo EVAH

On that note of public flogging, I'll let you get on with your day.  Check back later for more typos....

Monday, March 30, 2020

Weekend Wrap

Can anyone fill me in on whether weekends are still a thing?  Because each day seems mostly indistinguishable from the one that preceded ...

We Interrupt Our Regularly Scheduled Hunkering.... - For...wait for it, actual golf.

Way back in that more innocent era around March 20th, it appeared that we might benefit from our club's location just North of the NY-CT border.  I had previously shared that CT was under Martial Law, but added some wishful thinking about a potential recalibration in the near future.  So, if you're looking for proof of the existence of a merciful God?
The state of Connecticut is lifting its golf-course ban amid pleas from golfers and the industry that clubs should remain open during the coronavirus pandemic. 
The Connecticut State Golf Association (CSGA) in a letter to members Wednesday said the state Department of Economic and Community Development (DECD) is allowing golf courses to re-open, but the decision comes with a few caveats. 
According to CSGA, all clubhouses should remain closed, golf carts are being limited to one person and golfers are being urged to walk if possible. Restaurants are also closed or limited to take-out service only. Flagsticks and holes have also been raised to prevent players from touching cups.
That allowed your humble blogger to play thirteen holes of actual golf Saturday morning, which allowed for a test run of my new rig:

Our bags will have to learn proper social distancing etiquette.

As we all struggle against the inevitable despondency of the moment, I am as hopeful as anyone about things like hydroxychloroquine and chloroquine, but I'll be asking my own physician to prescribe 18 holes per day. Rinse and repeat as often as required....

The most notable facet of the day, contra that last bit in the excerpt above, is that we're no longer raising cups:


That is a normal golf cup turned upside down, and is a great improvement over that first hack of raising the cup an inch above the green surfaces.  It sits an inch or so below the green surface. thus balls fall in like they normally do, but the player can pluck them out readily without contact with the pin.  

It's also far superior for undermanned greens crews, because they can cut and roll the greens without removing the cups.  

There's no way of knowing how long we'll have this available to us, so the plan is to play as much as possible between now and the next closure.

I have one other story to share, but it requires me to inform you that yesterday was your favorite blogger's 65th birthday.  Celebrating birthdays hasn't been a high priority since the millennium, and the far more significant event occurred March 1st, when Medicare kicked in.  It was a surreal birthday for sure, though your sympathies should be directed to those with funerals and weddings disrupted.

The bride and I have taken to spicing up our lives with a mid-afternoon nap.... I know, I can hardly stand the excitement myself....  Anyway, we're up in bed reading and the house phone rings, which Employee No. 2 throws my way with an assurance that it "Must be for me".  I look at the handset and the caller ID is a long numerical string beginning with 44, which indicates the UK.  Hmmm, curious methinks, because Elsie and John had kindly phoned that morning and Lowell and I had done a Whats App video chat, so who could this be?

Turns out it was Jim McArthur, Captain of the Crail Golfing Society, calling every member that has a birthday.  As most of you will know, we joined last summer as Overseas Members, but of course don't really know anyone there....  yet.  It was strange and just a little awkward, but awfully nice, no?  

Slim Had Already Left Town - Mark Cannizaro of the NY Post is credited with breaking this "news":
The U.S. Open at Winged Foot has become the third golf major championship domino to fall as a result of the coronavirus crisis, The Post has learned.
Sources with knowledge of the United States Golf Association’s plans told The Post on Thursday night that Winged Foot has been informed the tournament will not take place in June as scheduled. The plan is for the tournament to remain at Winged Foot, but to be played later in the summer.
It's been many a week since I even considered the possibility that this event could happen as scheduled.  But it's interesting for those that have some familiarity with the relationship between the USGA and its hosting clubs, which has been tempestuous even in the best of times.  But if the club's members lose the early part of their summer golf, will they be willing to let the USGA "destroy" their member's course later in the summer?  I say "member's" course, because hosting a bigtime event at a 36 hole facility inevitably destroys the course not being played, though Winged Foot's East Course is hardly your typical relief eighteen...

It's quite obviously too early to seriously consider when events can be played, though of course we all need something to look forward to.  I'll let you peruse this, but you'll note that those speculating on Augusta Hotel Futures might be taking a hit on their contracts for October delivery:
The Masters in November? British Open in September? Ryder Cup in flux? Golf's 2020 plans under discussion, sources say
I'd love to see as many of these actually happen, but I'd like the Masters to get on the calendar soonest.  That's the one that we all know can happen, the rest might just be folks trying to stay relevant.

Today we have an embarrassment of riches, both a Tour Confidential and an Ask Alan.   From the latter we pluck this:
If you could pick a new month for every major, what and why? -@ScottMichaux 
Despite being limited to 280 characters, the questioner obviously failed to define his assumptions, most notably whether he's talking 2020 or permanently. 
Assuming we’re locked into this year’s venues, and that it takes until the end of the summer to beat the ‘rona (which is optimistic but let’s go with it): 
October: The Masters would be glorious in the fall foliage, and it feels right for it to be the first major, as always.
Again, it's important that there BE a Masters, I'm ambivalent between October and November. 
November: U.S. Open. The weather in New York in early November is often quite nice. And if not, Winged Foot will be a monster, which would make for a memorable national championship.
November isn't very fan friendly, but whatevah.... 
December: Open Championship. Dark, cold, nasty, miserable… sounds wonderful to me.
And that differs from July how?  One actual way is much less daylight, but I'm assumg any of these that happen will have smaller fields. 
January: PGA Championship. San Francisco has always enjoyed a glorious Indian summer, with some of its best weather in October-November. With climate change the early winter is often lovely. And if it’s cold and foggy… all the better.
Not for a certain Cablinasian golfer.... 

This riff is also silly, at least at this juncture, but I'm guessing you have time to fill:
3. According to the New York Post, the USGA has decided to postpone the U.S. Open until later this year, meaning the Open Championship is the only 2020 major that hasn’t yet been pushed. Assuming life returns to normal by early- or mid-summer and all four majors are squeezed into this calendar year, which players would the compressed schedule most benefit, and which players would it hurt?
Anyone playing well was hurt...Anyone off form might be helped, as well as those with injuries....can you say TW and BK?

But this back-and-forth shows the futility of guessing at this juncture:
Bamberger: Koepka comes to mind, because of his strength, because he gets on rolls more than most, because majors seems to be what he lives for. Tiger would be hurt because he needs such long breaks between events. 
Dethier: Au contraire, Tiger might do just fine because he could play the majors and nothing else. The typical schedule has a full month between majors, which seems like too long to rest but too short to squeeze in another event. This could benefit Woods, if they’re spaced right. The whole thing disadvantages players who like to tee it up early and often and have a heater going. Sungjae Im comes to mind. Patrick Reed had been strong, too. Bryson was finding form. Time will tell if that holds true through the layoff.
Is this the year that men's golf copies the LPGA and schedules majors in back-to-back weeks?  

Brandel Trolls - Have you followed L'affaire Chamblee?  I didn't have much interest in it initially, though perhaps its been over-taken by events.  We all understand that Golf Channel has many hours to fill with programming, and their talking heads will inevitably struggle to find anything of interest to babble on about.  Here's a precis of Brandel's thoughts: 
In the interview, Chamblee shared his unfiltered opinions on the golf instruction industry, 
TrackMan, and the unconventional swings of next-generation stars like Matthew Wolff and Viktor Hovland
“The teachers are being exposed for their idiocy,” Chamblee said, arguing that the internet age has forced a philosophical shift for the industry. “They completely spread this flawed philosophy through all of teaching and all teachers stuck to that ideal and all teachers taught flawed philosophies and these philosophies finally got b****-slhttps://www.linkedin.com/pulse/open-letter-pga-america-jonathan-doctorapped by reality. YouTube, there it is, you’re wrong, they’re right.
OK, even Brandel had to admit that using a term that ends in "slapped" was inappropriate.  But, given that the assistant professional at Bushwood Country Club is facing an apocalypse, is this really the time for this argument?

The PGA of America rushed to their members' defense with this:
PGA of America leadership issued a blistering condemnation of Brandel Chamblee Thursday, calling his explosive comments on golf instruction “offensive, sexist and disgraceful.” 
“In good conscience we cannot allow Brandel Chamblee’s comment in a Golfweek interview on March 25 that golf instruction has been ‘b****-slapped by reality’ be allowed to stand without comment,” PGA of America CEO Seth Waugh and President Suzy Whaley wrote in a letter to the editor at Golfweek. “It is offensive, sexist and disgraceful. Using such crude and hateful language is abhorrent in any context and in this case a direct contradiction to the countless programs and initiatives those in the industry provide to ensure everyone feels welcome in golf.”
Full circle, Suzy?  It was this very Suzy Whaley that was so anxious to stick the shiv in Ted Bishop back in the day to, you know, free up her current position.

So, how is this organization treating those 29,000 members?  Meet Jonathan Doctor, owner of JMJ Golf, who pens this open letter to the organization:
At a time when 28,000 men and women need their association the most, the PGA of America turns an easy birdie into bogey! If you needed proof of just how out of touch the PGA is with their 41 Sections, members, and associates read the email from Palm Beach Gardens regarding your dues. It is unbelievable that with golf facilities closed, professionals and associates laid off, commerce at a stand still, and lessons and clinics cancelled in the interest of social distancing that the largest sports organization on the planet cannot figure out a way to postpone or prorate yearly dues in such a way that does not make its members YET AGAIN question the need to even BE a PGA Member. 
You had an opportunity to stand by us and you blew it! Your email and commitment to SOP shows a complete lack of understanding. Your "reminder" that dues will be billed May 31st, and what happens if you do not pay at least your Section dues by July 31st shows no understanding of what your rank and file are facing. To suggest we take a loan at 4.99% to pay our dues only further shows lack of concern for the real debts your members are accruing every day of this crisis. To offer a payment plan spread over 6 or 12 months interest free would show understanding. To defer dues until Q4 would show understanding. To encourage facilities an incentive to support professionals in paying their dues would show understanding. But I guarantee it is no surprise to any PGA Professional who has had the unfortunate need for the associations support in matters of employment, education, or benefit assistance programs in the past to be reminded that the PGA does NOT understand.
But Jonathan, the new course in Frisco will rock!  

In the interest of full disclosure, there may be a legal issue involved here:
“During these extraordinarily challenging times for so many PGA Professionals, we have worked closely with our 41 sections to find the best path forward regarding 2020 dues payments,” said PGA President Suzy Whaley. “While we wish it was possible to waive dues for all members, as a 501(c) 6 not-for-profit organization, IRS regulations do not allow us to take such an action.
Pace Mr. Chamblee, Suzy is one PGA professional that quite obviously deserves to be b****-slapped.  First and foremost, is this a time when Suzy thinks laws are being faithfully followed?  Because New Yorkers are close to being under Martial law, and there ain't much in the way of constitutional authority for that...

More importantly, credit the members with paying their dues, and set it up as a loan fro now.  You can figure it out later, but it seems an awkward time to make your members send you actual money.  Then again, this is an organization that long hasn't seemed attuned to its members needs...

Alan In Full - We'll riff on more from Alan's mailbag:
Alan, what foursome would be the most fun to watch play 18 holes on a simulator on the same course in different home locations? You need the smack-talk flowing so based on that: Phil, Tiger, Rory, Rickie. -@forearmshivers 
I agree that trash talk is key so I’m puzzled by your inclusion of Rickie, who is far too earnest and bland. And as we saw at The Match, Tiger and Phil have zero chemistry together. I’ll take Phil, Jordan, Brooks, and Pat Perez, please and thank you.
Alan, are you that sure that the chemistry issue resides with Tiger?

But this just in from Alan's employer:


Stop, we've suffered enough already.
You and your BFFs Brooks and DJ sneak onto Pasatiempo this weekend. They play left-handed. Will you beat them? -@BobbyTe66671078 
Without question! Well, probably. It’s one thing to freewheel on a range with no target and no consequence — Brooks and Dustin have shown they’re both quite good at that because of their spectacular athleticism and hand-eye coordination. But to build a round you have to play so many touch shots, awkward stances, little 3/4 swings when you’re between yardages, big-breaking putts… I think all of these things would be a challenge standing on the wrong side of the ball. This makes Rickie’s 94 in his match against JT that much more impressive. If I play well at Pasa I’m going to shoot around 80. If I play poorly I’m gonna post 88-90. On that fiddly course I doubt either of those bruisers could beat those numbers playing left-handed. Of course, if we’re streaming it for social media I’ll likely choke my guts out and shoot 97, in which case it could be close.
Don't we think that if Alan throws up on his Foot-Joys that he'll hit triple digits?

I could well have used this above:
There’s a possibility of the Open and Ryder Cup being played behind closed doors. I understand the R&A’s rationale for the former – so the 150th playing can take place at St. Andrews – but the latter is an absurd notion, the galleries MAKE the Ryder Cup what it is! What say you, Alan? -@TheGolfDivoTee 
The notion of playing pro tournaments with no fans lasted about 24 hours, and I don’t think it’s coming back. As I tweeted when Jay Monahan first tried to sell this idea at the Players, it still takes hundreds and maybe thousands of people to conduct and televise a pro tournament, and they’re flying in from all over the globe. If the virus threat is still too grave to allow fans on-site it becomes impossible to justify holding the tournaments at all. As for the Open, St. George’s is one of the least-loved courses in the rota so no one will really squawk if it gets passed over.
Thousands?  I don't know what NBC's crew size is, but I'm certainly not ready to throw out this ides with the bath water.  But I do agree the Ryder Cup needs to be postponed to 2021...  It just makes no sense to focus on this event that includes all of 24 players.  Better to worry about the majors first, and maybe Tour events if there's enough time once we're safe out there.

This on the same subject from the TC gang:
2. The 2020 Ryder Cup is still on the schedule for Sept. 25-27 at Whistling Straits, but Tommy Fleetwood told Sky Sports News it would be most equitable to bump the event to next year. “From a fairness perspective, I think the qualification process should run its full course,” he said. Is Fleetwood right? Regardless of when the pro game resumes, should the Ryder Cup be moved to 2021? 
Bamberger: Likely a good idea, and since Fleetwood is saying it, a very good idea. If we can still get golf in this year — and here’s hoping we can! — it would be best to see the regular events be played and the majors if they can be. Nothing really will be lost by waiting until next year for the Ryder Cup. Just like the Olympics. 
Dethier: Assuming the Tour (and affiliated constituents) would agree to move the Presidents Cup back a year, too, this seems like a good and fine call. It would be a bummer, big-time, to miss out on team golf this year. But if there’s a run of majors that could happen in the late summer into fall, we’d have plenty of good action to watch while ensuring fair qualification for the following year. 
Sens: Agreed on all of the above. And if the Ryder Cup does wind up getting pushed back, it will survive just fine, as it did when it was postponed in 2001. All the more time for the excitement to build. 
LKD: With a big, whopping caveat that I am obviously not being briefed by scientists about the latest on the coronavirus outbreak, it seems far too early to make a call on the Ryder Cup. The Tour could be back up-and-running by May, with four months of play with a few majors squeezed in. It won’t be an ordinary qualification process, and it’s never going to be. These are extraordinary circumstances; the best we can do is try to roll with it.
It just seems obvious that this event, as great as it is, can't be a priority right now.  But Dylan's bit about the Tour agreeing is unintentionally hilarious.  

You might concluded that this questioner is not dealing well with the quarantine:
The Masters is a limited field event on a tricked-up course with a bunch of amateurs and geezers hogging precious spots; why do you guys act like it’s a major or something? -@frankprocida 
I agree with your thesis and have never tried to hide my disdain for the obsequious reverence of all things Augusta. And yet the Masters has a way of delivering transcendent moments that makes me forget about all of that and just enjoy and marvel at the drama. You should try that sometime.
There's more merit in that question than most folks might realize.  The effective size of the field is a point I've long made as well, and really should be understood as being unworthy of a major.  The hardest aspect of winning a Masters is often qualifying for it....

As for the golf course, "tricked up" is obviously over the top... And yet, there are indeed aspects of this golf course that puzzle and frustrate me.  Of course it's the best event of the year, but Frank isn't all wrong...

This is a nice diversion from the issues at hand:
Since bunkers are usually easier than rough (for good players) & harder and more money to maintain, are any golf designers going the sandless bunker route? To that end, what are your favorite sandless bunkers? I’m having trouble thinking of them offhand. -@Frazerrice 
Well, Sheep Ranch will elevate this conversation because it doesn’t have a single bunker. The site is so windy Bill Coore and Ben Crenshaw reasoned it would be impossible to keep sand from blowing away, so they didn’t even try. But the greens are surrounded by all manner of humps and hollows to make the pitching and chipping more interesting. My favorite sandless bunkers are the “dry washes” at Bel-Air, which Tom Doak brought back to life with his recent renovation. They are basically little creek beds that are grassed over but left rather wild. They are visually intimidating, but if you get lucky with the lie you can play shots out of them. The dry washes make for a much more interesting feature than traditional bunkers.
More topically, many of us have a sense that bunkers have become far too manicured and, therefore, easy for us all....  I personally am wondering if perhaps some good might come from the absence of rakes.  Discuss among yourselves...

This one touches on some memes from the Brandel discussion:
I formally request the Shipnuck Plan for us to get our Spieth back. Go bold, sir. Sans Greller? No more Cameron? What’s the plan? -@robert_curran3 
I would support one or both of those moves, just in the name of changing things up. But maybe having four or six or eight months off due to the virus is all Spieth needs. He’s clearly tunneled deep into his own head, and the relentlessness of the Tour schedule has never allowed him to fully reset. This sabbatical will certainly shift Spieth’s focus and give him the time and space he needs to work on his game and rebuild his confidence without the constant pressure and scrutiny of tournament play. Now, if he struggles in 2021 (or whenever the Tour resumes) it’s clearly time to blow things up. I’ve always contended that Jordan is too smart and too tough and too resilient not to figure things out. This forced time off will put that to the ultimate test.
The Simpson Plan is to abandon ship.
What are your favorite YouTube tournament rewatches? Highlights or full coverage? -@Topfrolf 
Definitely the whole enchilada. It’s so fun to immerse yourself in the telecast and all the little details. I gravitate toward the Opens, but you can pick almost any major championship broadcast from the 20th century and it will be loaded with treasure. I highly recommend Sean Zak’s “A Pod Unlike Any Other” as a companion piece for any Masters telecasts. I was recently part of the discussion of the 1989 tournament and it was a revelation to study the telecast so forensically. To cite but one example, on the 71st hole Scott Hoch pulls off one of the nastiest, naughtiest shots I’ve ever seen, from a horrendous spot behind the 17th green. If he had made the ensuing short par putt he probably wins the Masters and his spinny bump-and-run is one of the most celebrated shots in tournament history. But Hoch missed the putt and that shot has been lost to the dustbin of history. Every telecast has similar moments. The build-up is exquisite and mere highlights can never capture the tension.
Repeat after me, Hoch as in _____.  If I were to watch the final round of any toruney, I think it would the '75 Masters.
What’s the course itinerary for your next dream golf trip? -@LinksProf 
I still fantasize about posting up somewhere nice on Long Island and road-tripping to many of the best courses on the planet: National, Fishers, Shinny, Maidstone, Friar’s Head, Garden City, Bethpage, The Creek, St. Andrews, Piping Rock, Sebonack, Atlantic, Deepdale, Rockaway Golf and Hunting, Tallgrass… my gawd, I’m sweating just typing this.
 Anyone want to break the bad news to Alan, that:

  1. St. Andrews is not, nor has it ever been, on Long Island;
  2. St. Andrews, in addition to not being on LI, is a truly dreadful golf course with no redeeming features.
Sorry to be harsh, but it's interest is only in its role in U.S. Golf's history, as one of the five founding clubs of the USGA.

And, lastly:
How are the greens rolling today at Pebble? -@JacksJoeSalinas

Put it this way: there ain’t any footprints.
Le Sigh!

On Reading - Anyone remember Al Z.?  A good friend hardest hit by the shuttering of NYC, Al helpfully served as proofreader to the stars for the first few weeks of Unplayable Lies.  Trust me, I know how much we could use a proofreader here, as any time I have cause to exhume a prior post I am devastated by the typos and misspellings...  It's mostly a motor skill issue, though I don't expect that you'll care much about that.

We've previously discussed suggested golf reading, but Al's most recent suggestion covered enough ground to perhaps be of value to others:
I just finished American Dirt, by Jeanine Cummins. It's not quite as good as A Man Called Ove or A Gentleman in Moscow, but it's close.
I won't get to his latest for a bit, but those others are two of my favorites in the last couple of years.  For those who are readers, check them out if you haven't already.  Other suggestions are appreciated, as well...

As to why I won't get to American Dirt for a bit?  That's because I'm only 200 pages into this, and I therefore have a trip to Russia still ahead of me.  Word on the street is that it doesn't end well...

Stay safe, my friends, and I'll be back from time to time to check in on you.

Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Midweek Musings - Hunkering In Place

Can anyone help me with synonyms for hunker?  Seems like we'll be needing that going forward....

The Latest - We'll get to the Olympics for sure, but to me the biggest news is that golf in the UK is on lockdown:
With Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s statement announcing new restrictions on life in the UK in an effort to stop the spread of COVD-19, the English and Scottish Golf Unions confirmed the closure of golf courses and clubs. It’s the first significant closure since World War II, though even then some clubs remained open with special rules.

Forget that minor spot of trouble in the 1940's.  As this guy notes, they do this every 529 years or so:


I'm thinking that that "Pointless" is dangerously close to the truth...

Shack has a strange riff on our current situation, under this header:
Golf Must Stand Down To Eventually Thrive Again
For the good of humanity, the golf needs to stop.
As much as the dreadful COVD-19 appeared to be an opportunity to serve as an outlet while combating the coronavirus, it’s clear the best way for the virus to be eradicated is through social distancing. And while golf has generally complied—except for the inexplicable renting of carts or allowing multiple riders—the game must come to a halt.

Not because it’s suddenly less safe. But to avoid pretzly paragraph, everything must shut down because the planet is populated by a staggering number of numskulls who simply do not get it. Grade A, Prime Cut, All-Conference morons.

Depending on where you live, you’ve seen the ignorance to varying degrees. And while it’s painful to shut down an important form of exercise and a way of life for millions needing a recreational outlet, golfers have to join with the world and help stop the frightening spread. 

The silver lining: golf will be able to return to normalcy sooner than most activities. With a small values and priorities reset, the sport should be stronger despite likely losing some treasured community courses during this downturn.
I didn't realize that the social distancing was from "pretzly paragraphs"....  Seriously, I'll need an English translation.

But if the argument is that we shouldn't play golf because of those idiot kids on the beach in Florida, count me out.  Even stranger, this is the chart Geoff used in his rant:


First and foremost, did you actually believe those numbers from China?  But I've also been reading that the Italian death numbers are highly inflated....  apparently any elderly citizen that unfortunately passed has been attributed to the virus.  And it's a time of year when Italy's population typically experiences an elevated mortality rate, so we need some kind of estimate of the excess deaths.  

But Geoff has this as his header quote today:
If Brora was a few hundred miles south, it would surely be a big club. I know of no course on the Open Championship roster that has more to it than Brora. I reckon it would confound modern champions. Their outrageous length would count for little. 
PETER THOMSON
Which cues Shackologists that there's a news hook inside:
One of golf’s oldest and neatest places has shut down as ordered by the government, but is also signaling to members that survival is up in the air. Thanks to reader Chris for highlighting this distressing Tweet posted by Brora Golf Club to its members.

Damn, Brora is special....  It's way the eff up there, more than a bit North of even Dornoch.  At that link above, Shack has great photos and videos of the James Braid links, and I'll just add a few of my own:


The most notable feature of Brora is that the players share the links with sheep and livestock....  Theresa didn't see the need for social distancing back then, though the sheep themselves rather insisted on it.

Here's Elsie on the delightful Par-3 ninth, at the far end of the property:


For folks unfamiliar with linksy golf, that's a ball-retriever for use should you catch the small burn with your shot.  

This is the best picture I have of the low-voltage fences that protect the greens:


It's a wonderful, historic golf club, and sad to hear of their struggles.  

Geoff's case is that golf will come back earlier than other sports but stronger than ever.  But clubs have been under significant stress pre-Covid, and shuttering them will only increase that stress.  All businesses and organizations are stressed in the present moment, and golf clubs are of course not the priority for society...  But if the activity is safe and we can allow this aspect of normal life to move forward, why do we feel the need to clamp down?  

Scenes From America - I imagine this is happening all across our great nation:


People are resourceful, but thankfully they can also be pretty damn funny....

They can also be good, no doubt you're hearing the stories of compassion:

This from Seamus Golf, the guys that make those wonderful headcovers:
Hello Friends: 
Over the past few days we received inquiries from primary care physicians, nurses, and first responders for our masks. 
Prototyping began last week and ended with our first production run on Friday. We are using materials and constructing them in a way that each of these individuals still wants us to send them masks to use as a last resort. They have confirmed that what we are making is better than what they are resorting to use. 
We do not have the N95 material but are seeking it. 
By taking last week to disinfect and set up the office for social distanced production, we believe that we can continue to make products and keep our employees through this time.
We are temporarily closing the store to allow the full team to focus and assess the situation with masks. Our second production run begins tonight. 
If you are on the frontline and would like an emergency kit, please email
On the other end of the spectrum (and, well, we do mean the other end), the Country Club of Fairfax in Fairfax, Va., is offering free toilet paper in limited quantities to its members, but management is encouraging the members to instead donate $20 per roll to add to an employee relief fund established for the club staff.

In Newtown, Pa., the members of Jericho National Golf Club are taking a different tack. They have requested that their $150 monthly food minimum be given to the club’s employees. 
Reassigning employees, or cross-training them, is a plan enacted by many clubs to keep their staffs working—and earning income. This has enabled The Cliffs and Kiawah Island Club in South Carolina, both owned by South Street Partners, to keep their 1,100 seasonal personnel employed.
Part of the reason not to shut down golf unless absolutely necessary....  

This is equally nice, though Employee No. 2 is likely hardest hit:
Tito's vodka working to make 24 tons of hand sanitizer
Also amusing, what was this guy thinking?
After panic buying, Denver Mayor reopens liquor, pot shops but keeps ‘stay at home’ order in place
About Those Olympics... -  Anyone surprised by the mendacity of the International Olympic Committee has simply not been paying attention for the last few decades.  perhaps they don't scale the heights of corruption and depravity achieved by FIFA, but this is an organization from whom social distancing has long been appropriate.  

So, you might have noticed that the IOC was rather late to the party in recognizing that Tokyo this July was not possible or helpful.  Tellingly, they couldn't face that reality until the athletes forced their hand:
As the drumbeat to postpone the Tokyo Summer Olympic Games grows louder by the
day, with athletes and national governing bodies continuing to speak out amid a patchwork of dispatches suggesting one alternative or another, the International Olympic Committee announced, finally and very belatedly on Sunday afternoon, that it will decide the fate of the Games within the next four weeks
In the midst of the expanding coronavirus pandemic, the IOC still could decide to keep the Olympics on the calendar as scheduled, July 24 to August 9, or it could postpone them. The Games will not be canceled, IOC president Thomas Bach said. 
It was the world’s athletes who forced Bach’s hand, who successfully urged that something be done to begin to address growing concerns about their health and their ability to train for the Olympics in the midst of so much uncertainty.
 Not a good look, for sure....  Geoff had this reaction:
Some day, when things return to normal, we can look back on this latest hiccup for the Olympic movement and consider how golf best fits going forward. But for now, at least, we no longer have to see speculation about who will make teams or worry about the preparation being hampered and instead focus on those in need.
If only, Geoff....  Because we have you-know-who beating this oh-so-tired drum, first with quite the alt-history:
For some golfers those Games were a game-changer. In high school and college they may have been nerdy loners, but in Rio they were accepted as part of their respective national teams. They wore the same swag, ate at the same training tables, and worked out in the gym alongside the other athletes. The golfers finally got to feel both the support of a team and the respect of hardcore jocks. And seeing the lusty celebrations of gold medal winner Justin Rose helped shift sentiment a bit, too. As always, there are commercial considerations in explaining the uptick in interest for the Tokyo Games: Asia is a much bigger golf market than South America, so this time around Olympic success could help a player move product and scoop up fat endorsement appearances.
Really, name one?  The 2016 comp benefited from likable champions who seem to revel in their gold medals.  Though I've always thought that Rose's emotional reaction was the result of his not winning anything else that year....  

But this is the nut of Alan's silly argument, including the item's header:

So the postponement of these Games feels like just another bummer in a string of sad news as this golf season continues to unravel. But there is a monumental silver lining: pushing the Games to next summer (as seems inevitable) will greatly enhance Tiger Woods’ chances of making the team and therefore turning Olympic golf into a big deal. Imagine Woods leading the entire American delegation into the stadium during the Opening Ceremonies, waving the stars and stripes – it would be a goosebumps moment that evokes Magic Johnson in Barcelona. 
Tiger, 44, has openly coveted a spot on the U.S. team, knowing this is likely the last chance for the son of a Green Beret to represent his country. It would be a spectacular experience to share with his kids, who have become a powerful source of late-career motivation. But so far this season a bad back, mediocre play and a limited schedule has left Woods on the outside looking in. Bumping the Games to next summer will hopefully give Tiger time to get his body right, find some form and make a push to secure a spot on the U.S. team. That would definitely be worth the wait.
This is silliness on stilts, Alan.  First and foremost, we're dealing with the cancellation/postponement of The Masters, U.S. Open and Open Championship, and you're obsessed over a silly exhibition with barely 30 world-class players in the field?  You might want to see someone over this obsession...

But in a certain way, this might represent progress for Alan....As I reread that header, it comes across as an admission that Olympic Golf needs saving....

But I'm also struck by how unlikely it is that Tiger would make an Olympic team, which requires that he be among the top four American golfers in the OWGR.  Given that he's currently not sufficiently healthy to play golf, it's quite the leap to assume his health looking forward.  But we also know that, even if healthy, the man is simply not going to play much golf.  He would almost have to pick off a major to stay in the top four Yanks, and that's quite the big ask...  Instead of just assuming its importance, how about we use our platform to argue for fixing the format to make it worth watching?  I know, crazy talk.

But has anybody actually cared about the Olympics since the end of the cold war?  

Date, Circled - I'd much rather focus on items such as this:
How might an autumn Masters look, feel and play? Here’s what the experts think
Do tell:
Looking for a nice problem? Consider this: How will the course play if the Masters is held in October? How will the fellas adjust to Augusta National in autumn?
Anyone who has been to Augusta National in October knows how beautiful the course is. The course has few hardwoods, but in the fall, which comes early to Georgia, they stand out amid the many pines. The members like to talk about how fast and firm the course often plays when the club has its annual opening weekend in October. But stubborn facts suggest the course would actually play softer and longer than it does in April, as October gets more rain in Augusta than April does, on average and over the years. One thing the club cannot buy is the thing it craves: firm, fast conditions that make the course more playable for players.
Of course, though we've had no shortage of wet and cold Aprils in recent years... For those of you in my age group, there was discussion at one point of playing there in the summer.  Fire up the Waybac Machine:
Golf at Augusta in October has been in the news before, years ago. In October 1992, two Southern powerbrokers held an unexpected press conference at the club. The older of the two men was the club’s courtly chairman, Jack Stephens, from Little Rock. Beside him was a bespectacled Atlanta real-estate entrepreneur named Billy Payne. Payne wasn’t a 
Jack Stephens.
member of Augusta National then. He later became the club’s chairman and last year was inducted into the World Golf Hall of Fame. But in October of 1992 he was the head of the Atlanta Committee for the Olympic Games, where the Summer Games were played in 1996. The Payne-Stephens press conference was held on the lawn behind the club’s iconic clubhouse. They had a dream, for golf to return to the Olympics in 1996, with Augusta National as the venue. 
The dream died quickly, a victim of political fallout regarding the club’s exclusionary membership practices. But when discussion of a Masters in October surfaced in recent days, the picture from that day suddenly came rushing back. 
Had there been Olympic golf at Augusta National, the course would have had to be suitable for both men and women to play in a two-week period from late July to early August, during a sweltering stretch when Augusta National had always been closed. It showed how flexible Augusta National can be, when it chooses to be so. 
Stephens asserted in ’92 that the club had the means to maintain its famously slick bentgrass greens in the summer. And that was before Augusta National had installed a SubAir system that controls the greens’ temperature and moisture.
They can do anything they want...  As for the rest of the course:
As for the Bermuda grass on the rest of the course, which every fall is shaved and overseeded with the perennial rye grass upon which the Masters is staged, Stephens said it could be prepped for tournament play at any time of year. And grass-growing has only become a more scientific pursuit since then.
 There are some other issues of which we should be aware:
October is also the tail end of Georgia’s hurricane season. When Hurricane Michael cut a 
Fall in Amen Corner.
devastating path across Georgia in 2018, it wreaked havoc on Augusta on Oct. 11, bringing high winds, heavy rain and power outages. 
The outside threat of tropical storms aside, the wind is actually gentler in October than in April. That doesn’t mean it would be easier. Jackson said October winds usually blow out of the north, which is in the players’ faces on the first tee and from right to left in Amen Corner. Good luck playing that second shot into 11, with that pond on the left of the green. A north wind would also make the two back-nine par-5s play longer.
So, let's sum up... Softer conditions with gentle winds from a direction making the Par-5's reachable for only the longest hitters?  Smells like Rory's best chance ever....
But how wonderful would it be, in this odd and difficult year, to have the tournament then, as a grand fall golf party? To have a Masters golf tournament, famous rite of spring, played smackdab in the middle of football season? To watch the players try to figure out different grasses, winds, colors, clubs? 
What a lovely set of problems to consider.
Amen, Sister!

Let the other organizations figure out whether the events can be held, given the progression of the virus.  I'll be rooting for them, as more high-level golf is better than less.  But let's get this one on the calendar soonest, as Augusta National can actually pull this off.  I'm far more skeptical of the other championships...  I mean, has anyone stopped to consider the irony that this is the year we're supposed to go to San Francisco and Westchester County?  If you look at the location data for confirmed cases and deaths, the only thing missing from this year's rota is Sahalee or Chambers Bay..... 

Upon further review, I suppose this might have been 2022, when the Ryder Cup will be in...wait for it...Italy.

Reading Suggestions - Folks are combing through the vaults, so old gems are available for time killing and edification purposes.  This one is well worth your time:
The last days of Bobby Jones 
The first in a series of classic stories in Golf Digest looks at a declining Bobby Jones at the end of his life and the enduring relationship he had with the author

By 1968 Bobby Jones’ health had slipped from the terrible to the abysmal. His eyes were bloodshot from the spinal disease he had endured for 20 years, his arms atrophied to the size of a schoolgirl’s, his ankles so swollen by body fluids they spilled over the edges of his shoes. This was a man who could once effortlessly drive a golf ball a sixth of a mile.
Is that Clifford Roberts with Jones?
Still, he had not lost the humor with which he viewed so many things, often at his own expense. Confined to a wheelchair all day, he had to be put into and taken out of bed by a male nurse, who was the size of a linebacker. “He handles me like a flapjack,” Bob said by way of complimenting the man when he introduced us. Then he chuckled. Bob laughed a lot, although never out loud, and he laughed during his last days mostly to put people at their ease, especially strangers. Meeting him then for the first time could be a shock, and Bob knew it. But he insisted on shaking hands with everybody, painful as it had to be, excruciating if his hand were squeezed. But it was part of the price he insisted on paying for having been Bobby Jones, the one and only. 
Having covered the Masters for 20 years, I had become his companion during it by a choice that was as much his as mine. Those years became the most fulfilling of the 44 I have been writing about golf. I’ve never written about them, and don’t know why. In looking back, that period in his life seems as towering as the Grand Slam.
We don't have many that can fill his shoes these days, but I do get this:
We would sit at a card table next to a window in his cottage that overlooked the 10th tee. A curtain prevented spectators from looking in but allowed Bob to peer out. He had the same thing for lunch almost every day. First there’d be a couple of dry martinis, which he drank with relish but scolded himself for. “I shouldn’t be drinking these,” he said to me one day. “They don’t mix with my medicine.” The martinis would be followed by a hamburger, in part because he liked hamburgers but mainly because he could no longer cut meat and disliked anyone cutting it for him, so gnarled had his fingers become. 
Bob smoked more than two packs of cigarettes a day, sometimes in chain fashion, and they were lined on the card table in neat rows for him, each in a holder so he would not accidently burn himself. An elegant lighter, covered in leather, sat ready. All he had to do was push down a lever that any child could. But even that was becoming an effort. So, with as much nonchalance as I could devise, I’d pull out a cigarette of my own, thereby giving me the excuse to light his.
He had been a man who never looked as though he needed help, even when he was dying, and it was part of Bob’s magnificence that disablement evoked admiration more than pity. Those cigarettes were actually a token of his will to live, not the other way around. One day he left me speechless after I lighted one for him. “I’ve got to give these things up,” he said. “They’re bad for me.”
I find that strangely life-affirming....  a towering figure in our game, so you'll want to read the entire piece.

Folks have also been posting all sorts of old-timey photos, including this of Jones after his 1927 Open Championship win at St. Andrews:


he was, of course, holding Calamity Jane, his putter....  Jones had quite the relationship with St. Andrews, which began quite inauspiciously:
1921 : At 19, Bobby Jones made his debut at the Open Championship on the Old Course. It was at the infamous 11th High Hole that Jones took four shots to get out of a bunker, then picked up his ball and disqualified himself. After that day, Jones would never lose another match or contest at the Old Course.
His 1930 Grand Slam (O.B. Keeler had originally called it the Impregnable Quadrilateral, but later settled on the easier term from bridge) began with a win at The Amateur at St. Andrews as well, and this was his final visit to the Auld Grey Toon:
1958 : Honored with the Freedom of the City Award for not only his achievements in golf, but because Bobby Jones was "...a man of outstanding character, courage and accomplishment." Jones was the first American in 200 years to be honored by St. Andrews; Benjamin Franklin was the previous recipient.
The award comes with these wonderful benefits:
As you probably know by now, this allows him to take divots on the Old Course, to chase rabbits there, and to dry his laundry on the first and 18th fairways.
Jones' remarks were pitch perfect, with this most notable sentiment:
"I could take out of my life everything except my experiences at St. Andrews and I'd still have a rich, full life."
But it's the scene after Jones' remarks that is remembered, and if you can keep a dry eye you're a better man than your humble blogger:
Jones made his painful way from the stage before going down the centre aisle of the Younger Graduation Hall in an electric golf cart, draped with the flag of the State of Georgia. 
Whereupon an audience of 1,500 broke spontaneously into the Scottish love-song "Will ye no' come back again?" Herbert Warren Wind wrote later that it was "10 minutes before many who attended were able to speak again with a tranquil voice."
Those over-emotional Scots...

There's also a wonderful story of Jones dropping in without fanfare in 1936, en route to the Berlin Olympics.  He played the old girl and by the time he came up the 18th fairway it seemed the entire town's populace was surrounding the green. 

Here's another gem from the Golf Digest vault:
Will Greg Norman reach superstardom? 
From the archive: Even as far back as 1984, Greg Norman's immense talent came in a complicated package
Obviously written in the early days of his career, the answer would seem to be, "Yes, but....".

But in introducing the piece and its writer, the worthy Peter Dobereiner, a story is shared that exlipses anything in the original profile:
He became equally known for failing to close in them down the stretch, the epic example coming at the 1996 Masters when he led by six after three rounds. Upon entering the clubhouse on Saturday night, all but triumphant, Norman encountered his old friend Peter Dobereiner on the way to the locker room. They embraced heartily and Peter whispered in his ear, “Greg, even you can’t f--- this one up.” The next day, Norman shot a 78 to Nick Faldo’s 67. Norman had finished runner-up in the majors for an eighth time.
Upon further review, he's got this!

And how about this one where the timing seems off:
Eleven years. That’s about how long Tiger Woods went between winning majors before
claiming the Masters in 2019. It’s also approximately how long Neil Oxman, who has caddied for Tom Watson in 150 events since 1999, had gone without seeing a replay of the 2009 British Open at Turnberry in Scotland. 
But that was before the coronavirus shut down the sports world and left Oxman housebound. In trying to fill the gaps in its TV schedule, Golf Channel recently aired a replay of its documentary “Tom at Turnberry,” and Oxman tuned in. 
“Someone texted me beforehand and asked me if I was going to watch it. My text back was, ‘Do you think the result will be any different?'” Oxman tells The Forecaddie. “At least 500 people have said to me, ‘Have you seen it?’ and I kept saying, ‘No.’ Nor had I ever looked at a replay of the last shot. Ever.”
Both Tom and Oxman believe that he hit the proper shot, which was undone by landing on a downslope and shooting over the green.  Perhaps...

 Last up is this summary of the best 13 moments from an event lost to the virus:
The 13 Most Memorable Moments from the WGC-Match Play
What would be top-of-mind thoughts here?  Stephen Ames and a certain 9 & 8 result?  Check.

Victor Dubuisson getting up and down from everywhere?  Check.

Tiger losing to Nick O'hern?   Check, though here one needs to be specific, because it happened twice.

But they actually captured one of my favorite incidents in the long history of our game:
Keegan and Miguel nearly come to blows (2015)
The undercard for that week's Mayweather-Pacquiao fight involved Miguel Angel Jimenez, Keegan Bradley, and Keegan Bradley's caddie, Steve "Pepsi" Hale. Apparently, Jimenez didn't like what he was seeing with a Bradley drop on the 18th hole, and Bradley and Hale didn't appreciate Jimenez butting in. Things got really HEATED (remember, this is golf) when Jimenez told Hale to "Shut up." In the end, Jimenez won the match and Bradley later admitted he "got schooled" in gamesmanship by the veteran Spaniard.
Here's what you need to be reminded of to appreciate the comedy gold.

First, this was the last year at Dove Mountain, but the first year of pool play, and occured on the Friday, the third day of said pool play.  Both Keegan and Miggy had lost both previous matches, so this match had absolutely no import whatsoever, just two losers playing out the string.

Secondly, as an astute golfer, you'll recognize that this is match play, meaning that Miggy had every right to get involved, and was actually doing Keegan a favor in doing so.

But the final image is what lingers...  Keegan was so upset by this that he took refuge in his courtesy car stroking his girlfriends lapdog.  And that folks is my enduring image of Keegan Bradley.....

Stay safe, dear readers, and we'll get together again soon.