Your Friday Frisson

Gee, what do you folks want to talk about this morning?  I thought so....

We Interrupt Our Regularly Scheduled Programming - We'll make you wait a sec for the Tiger Scat:

ORLANDO, Fla. — Henrik Stenson had a hot putter, a much quieter crowd and a one-shot lead in the Arnold Palmer Invitational. 

One week after Stenson returned from his winter break and spent two days with Tiger Woods and his raucous crowds, he made birdie on half of the holes at Bay Hill for an 8-under 64, his lowest round ever on the course the King built. 

PGA Tour rookies Aaron Wise and Talor Gooch each had 65. Wise missed a 6-foot birdie putt on the final hole.

I watched a bunch of it until nodding off, but didn't see a 64 coming.  Just to frame how good a round this was (and not to exclude the 65's and 66's), here was Geoff's comments about course conditions in his preview post:

The Bay Hill greens are firm and fast after several dry, cool days, a characteristic Tiger and other tough-course types love. A birdie shootout will not happen.

Will.  Not.  Happen.   Got it, Geoff.

While I was watching, Rory looked as confident as I've seen him since Valhalla....  But it seems that it didn't end well:

Only one of them was pleased with it. Els, who has gone more than a year since his last finish in the top 30, dropped only one shot, on the opening hole. McIlroy had five birdies through 10 holes and then hit out-of-bounds on the 18th hole for a double bogey.

Corkscrewed -  A fun tribute to the King this week:

For a second straight year, golfers at the Arnold Palmer Invitationalparticipated in a driving range salute to The King. But this time, there was a twist. Literally. 

Led by Palmer's grandson, Sam Saunders, those teeing off in succession at Bay Hill's driving range on Wednesday were all asked to do their best imitation of Arnie's famed follow-through.

Videos at the link.  

68 - He's now posted five straight under par rounds, so folks are getting a bit excited.  I hear talk that he's done well at this venue in the past.

Jason Sobel focuses on that putt:

None was more exciting than the one he hit on the par-3 seventh hole -- his 16th of the

day. With a pin set to the left side of the green, Woods missed on the right side of the putting surface. He then drained a 71-foot birdie that elicited huge roars from the gallery and a giant smile from Woods himself. 

"My dad always told me, 'Just putt to the picture,'" he later said. "And I was asking for it to bite as it came over that knob. It was a little too hot, and it had to crash in the hole."

C'mon, you used that bit last week.  I manage to come up with new material every day, is it too much to ask of you? 

Jay Coffin on that drive:

Standing on the third tee (his 12th hole of the day) at 3 under par, Woods took a massive swipe with a 3-wood and his ball blew some 40 yards right of the fairway. 

The ball was entangled in a temporary mesh fence that guarded the back yard of an adjoining house that served as out of bounds. Woods walked to his ball, called over a rules official and quickly was told the ball was OB.

“Well, you look at the two poles and I’m out by probably 3, 4, 5 inches,” Woods said. Asked if his ball hit a cart path near the area, Woods bluntly said, “I didn’t know. I wasn’t exactly in the mood to ask.” 

Woods was miffed with the outcome and stormed back to the tee then promptly hit another 3-wood right. This time he was able to play his next shot onto the green and a two-putt handed him a double-bogey 6.

I'll just note that Tiger seems to retain that nagging propensity for that which old Friend Hank Haney calls The Big Miss.  On the flip side, Shack noted this:

A side note: the second shot after his provisional tee shot was particularly stout and one of the more impressive I’ve seen in his comeback bid. He had to cut it around a tree from the rough, with water left and already lying three. A slight double-cross and he makes seven or eight.

So, it was a good double bogey.... I'd have been less concerned if it were with driver, but a 40-yard miss with a 3-wood?  My rule of thumb is that if you miss by four first downs, whining about it being inches OB is kinda missing the big picture.

Eammon Lynch catches up with Graeme McDowell, but first his amusing lede:

ORLANDO — The last time Tiger Woods arrived at Bay Hill Golf Club to be greeted with reasonable expectations was in 1991. That week, he won the first of his three straight U.S. Junior titles, beating a kid called Brad Zwetschke in extra holes. Zwetschke went on to quit golf, become a preacher and enlist in the Army. Tiger just went on winning. Especially at Bay Hill.

That was when Tiger first met Arnie...  No word on whether Earl behaved himself better than at Newport.

Now some perspective, via the Portrush native:

The reality is that this week is just another staging post on Woods’ climb back to the top, not the destination. And nor is it an omen for what might follow three weeks from now in Georgia. Woods has won the Arnold Palmer Invitational four times since he last slipped on the green jacket in 2005. 

Form here does not beget form there. 

None of which detracts from the excitement Woods’ strong play has brought to the sport.

“It doesn’t say much for the world of golf. We were all saying how healthy things were when he was gone, and now he’s back beating us all up again. Maybe we’re not as good as we thought we were,” McDowell says, laughing. “It’s pretty impressive. And it’s good for us all.”

True that, and we'll get to The Masters in a bit....

Mike Bamberger with some interesting questions he'd like to ask Tiger:

* You have played golf with Barack Obama and Donald Trump in the past half-year. How do their personalities come through in their golf?

* What time did you have to get your day started, and what do you have to do, to get your 42-year-old fused back ready to play on a cold morning with an 8:23 a.m. tee time?

* You have had an incredibly rich life, with many ups and some significant downs. Which do you learn more from?

* What kind of interest are your kids showing in golf?

* Where did you get the beaded Buddha bracelet you wear after finishing your rounds and what does it mean to you?

* If this phrase is at all meaningful, who do you play for?

Maybe when he gets to Jack's age, but for now he's far more interesting as a player than as an interviewee.

Masters Stuff -  We'll lede with a Q&A from Alan Shipnuck's weekly mailbag:

Is the Masters overrated? -@TwoInchesShort 

Of course it is. It is merely a golf tournament, while the hagiographers and sycophants among us treat the Masters like an orgasmic religious experience. The treacly piano music, the silly old traditions — I mean, who really likes or cares about pimiento cheese? — the stupid code words that must be used, the worshipping of the white-washed good old days…it's all a bit much. The course has been diminished, too. (I was thunderstruck by the anecdote in Bamberger's recent Nicklaus story in GOLF Magazine that Billy Payne was unaware that the playing characteristics of the Old Course inspired Augusta National, but this indifference to strategy and design by a recent chairmen explains a lot.) All that said, it's still a helluva golf tournament. The course is undeniably beautiful and exciting, the fan experience is the best in sports, the finishes skew toward the thrilling. Overrated that it might be, the Masters is still great.

Alan, I envy you so much.  I'll be 63 in a couple of weeks and I've yet to have my first orgasmic religious experience.....  Where does one go for that?  I guess ANGC is the obvious answer...

I do share his concerns about the golf course, especially as we await their decision as to whether or not to lengthen No. 13, as close to a perfect golf hole as we'll find.  But, and this is really the key bit, it's pretty much everyone's favorite tourney of the year.  So, quibble to your heart's content, but I'd miss my own funeral to watch the final round.

But what I really want to talk about are these Masters' odds:

And here is Geoff's take on them:

Typically, Tiger's Masters odds have been wildly inflated by curiosity bettors and while most futures numbers are fairly silly, I can't come up with a strong reason to argue against his placement is out of line. 

After all, his health seems great, his mental state is fantastic, the putting sensational and the power is back. Other than having not won at Augusta National since 2005 or a tournament since 2013, it seems a matter of time.

The 8/1 is silly given how many players are on their game as they approach a place where track records matter, but favorite status seems perfect legitimate. And so surreal.

To put the difference this time around in perspective, never forget the T17 in 2015 where he came into Augusta with no rounds, no body and none of the positive energy he has now. (This Michael Bamberger SI piece is a good reminder how different that Masters lead-up was.)

I'd like to respectfully disagree, though my style leans more towards calling him an ignorant slut.

I'll be watching the second round at Bay Hill later and his comeback is no doubt the story of the year thus far, but do we really think he's more likely to win than DJ or JT?  And if the case is "horses for courses", I'm not sure I like him better than Bubba.

But it's really the disparity that's so crazy....  I could see him slotted in as a second tier fave, but Tiger at 8-1 vs. the guy that actually won it last year at 30-1?  

My gut says that Augusta might be a tough week for him, and I actually like him better at Shinny.  He won't hit too many drivers there, and his ability to shape the ball will be quite the asset.  Of course, those 40-yard misses will be a problem anywhere....

All Alan - He was on quite the roll in that mailbag, so why should I work hard when he already has?

It does start with this lay-up:

Which victory was less popular/most disappointing: Paul Casey at the Valspar or Stewart Cink over Tom Watson at the 2009 Open? #AskAlan -Tony (@ducksphan) 

Both were soul-crushing but the stink of Cink's win remains more foul for the simple reason that Watson's run was a once-in-a-lifetime stroll down memory lane for a 59-year-old. Something rare and magical happened on the auld sod and the second it was over we knew Old Tom would never again have such an opportunity. It's pretty clear that, barring the unforeseen, Woods will have plenty more chances to win, and if/when he does we'll be able to forgive Casey and his trespasses.

Pulleaz!  No souls were crushed last weekend....  Tiger had an indifferent day, the putt on No. 17 excluded, and everyone was happy with his progress.  Category error.

Why do so many people hate fun and complain about how much attention Tiger gets when his winning would represent one of the most compelling comeback stories we've seen? -@Peter_Bukowski

Are people still complaining? The kvetching was defensible coming out of Riviera, when Tiger missed the cut and the contours of this comeback were still unclear. But after his excellent play at PGA National and scintillating near-miss at Innisbrook, even the most ardent Tiger-hater has to be intrigued, if not excited. For sure, some slice of the population will never forgive Woods for the sex scandal and other misdeeds. But what he's doing right now between the ropes is monumental. How could we possibly look away?

Of course it is.... The problem was really the prior iterations, where Tiger was less than candid about his physical condition.   

Seeing the photos of the phone-holding crowds surrounding Tiger makes me wonder who is the biggest annoyance to pro golfers: fans with phones or professional photographers? -Paul (@paulkaps) 

Oh, fans by a million miles. The pro snappers are hyperaware of the golfers' space and rituals and quirks and work very hard to be unobtrusive. On the rare instances when someone clicks in a backswing you can be sure it wasn't one of the veteran photographers on the beat but rather a local yokel who wangled a credential. Believe me, the players know the difference. And in general they appreciate the effort of the snappers, who are out there from dawn to husk hustling around with heavy equipment, as opposed to the scribes, who might leisurely stroll nine holes, all the while tweeting barbs.

I think his basic point is correct, though I think he errs in his use of the word "rare".

The new USGA rules allow for the tamping down of 'shoe damage, indentations from a club or flagstick, and animal damage.' How long will PGA Tour rounds take now that spike marks, alleged spike and imaginary marks can be smoothed? -@AnthonyPioppi 

Put it this way: we're going to be longing for the brisk pace of play J.B. Holmes displayed at Torrey Pines.

I disagree.  Revel in the time saved from them mismarking their balls to avoid scuff marks....

Why is Tiger Woods's World Ranking so abysmal? Couldn't he have been protected with a medical exemption? Also when does he get into the top 50, the top 10…and where does he top out? -Oskar (@tallboy)

The 'minimum divisor' is the issue here. To ensure that players don't sit on good results to protect a high ranking, their total World Ranking points are divided by 40, what is essentially the minimum number of tournaments they must play in a two-year period. In these injury-ravaged past two years, Woods has accrued 43.77 points. That number is divided by 40, giving him an average of 1.09, which ranks 149th. But if you divide 43.77 by Tiger's actual number of starts over the last two years – 8, including Dubai - his average is 5.47, which would currently rank 13th(!) in the world. Cracking the top 50 isn't easy because it's a closed shop – Woods's low ranking is keeping him out of the WGCs, which offer easy points, which helps the top 50 players stay in the top 50. Because of the divisor issue he'll have to play lights-out for a sustained period to sniff the top 10 in the rankings. But as we're seeing, Tiger is redefining in real-time what seems possible.

Go ahead, blame the divisor, that's only doing its job.

These terms seem to be used interchangeably, but I'd like to know: what is the difference between a chip and a pitch? -Christopher (@hanfordchris) 

They are entirely different. Sort of. A chip is a delicate little shot close to the green, while a pitch is a longer shot from farther away. The tricky thing is that it's entirely subjective when a chip becomes a pitch! When in doubt, just say, "Nice play."

No, the difference is trajectory.... or, for those in the know, traj.  A pitch is lofted high a chip is lower....  

This bit he's used previously:

What is your favorite course on the Florida swing? #AskAlan -Matt (@PurdueMatt05)

Seminole.

The real answer is The Copperhead. 

Who's the one Tour player who every other PGA golfer would step in and help in a bar fight? (The anti-Bubba question.) -@CraigPostons 

It's gotta be Steve Stricker, the nicest, sweetest, most universally liked guy in golf. Watching him get beat up at a Cracker Barrell would spur even the meekest golfer to action.

The real answer is Grayson Murray.....  Gotcha!

And my fave this week:

Given that he has a better career record than Price and Norman, Vijay is a cinch to be appointed Presidents Cup captain sooner or later. Right? -Juan (@jmhst2003) 

Now this is funny. You do know that Vijay has spent the last several years embroiled in a nasty lawsuit with the PGA Tour, right? And that it's the suits in Ponte Vedra Beach who appoint the Presidents Cup captains? Golf bureaucrats have very long memories. Mark O'Meara and David Duval led the Ryder Cup pay-for-play insurrection at the 1999 PGA Championship. In the years that followed O'Meara campaigned hard to be a Ryder Cup captain and even enlisted Tiger to make the case but there's a reason it never happened. Duval will never be considered either. So, it would be a shocker if Vijay ever gets the nod…unless it's part of a top-secret settlement.

I would pay to be in the room when some newbie VP throws out the name....  Good times.