Reader Mailbag

I'm not in Van Cynical's position as regards reader mail, but i do have a couple of items to share with you.

First, Maggot (real name) writes with this golf joke:

Milo and Stosh are standing on the 18th tee at their Polish Country Club.

They are the final twosome in the Polish Country Club Championship and are
tied for the lead. The 18th hole is a beautiful par four with a deep valley,
descending down to a dogleg right.

Both Milo and Stosh hit long, straight tee shots which disappear down into
the valley. A short time later, the fore caddie appears at the top of the
hill and announces that both balls are within 6 inches of each other, but
there's a problem. Both of the golf balls are Titleist # 4s.

Milo and Stosh look at each other and realize that they had not informed
each other as to what kind of ball they were playing, nor its number. They
quickly descend into the valley and, sure enough, their two Titleist golf
balls are right next to each at the bottom of the valley in the middle of
the fairway.

Stosh looks at Milo and says, "We had better get a ruling from a tournament
official to straighten this out. This is the Polish Country Club
Championships and we don't want to be disqualified for making a mistake and
hitting the wrong ball. After all, we are tied for the lead."

Soon after, a rules official appears and examines the two # 4 Titleist golf
balls. He then looks up at Milo and Stosh and says,

"Which one of you is playing the orange ball?”

OK, there goes all my Polish traffic.  

Next, dear friend Elsie, d/b/a The Scottish Housewife, writes from Strathpeffer in the Scottish Highlands to brag about her temperate weather and commiserate with Theresa over her winter from hell.  But this is her closer:

And spare a thought for the reader Scott.. it is a massive time suck  reading your blog!!!!.. as it takes away from my Scottish housewife duties..... but well worth it as it brightens my day

Forgive me if I sound insensitive to my reader(s), but I'm dealing with an exponentially higher level of time suck, as these carefully crafted, insightful posts don't actually write themselves.  And I'm barely 60% finished when I hit "Publish."  As day inevitably follows night, Al Z.'s e-mail arrives with humiliating numbers of required corrections.  Then there's the ensuing grammar arguments.... 

Don't take the whine too seriously, as I'm enjoying this greatly.  I just wish I had greater command of the technical details, and more time to think through the posts.