Hope Springs Eternal

Bob Hope, born Leslie Townes Hope in England in 1903, was a man I would have liked to know and would have especially loved to have teed it up with.  He was far more serious about his profession than his delightfully sneering attitude and self-deprecating manner would have you believe.  Fortunately I don't have to invest my time any summarizing Hope's life and career for you, as Canadian writer Mark Steyn did the job Americans won't do in a 2003 piece for The New Republic.

But before reading Steyn's piece, watch this, from The Big Broadcast of 1938:

One of my recurring themes is that each time golf cuts its ties to its own history, something important is lost.  And while I recognize that the Tour and Golf Channel went to significant effort to keep Hope in the script this past weekend, it's unfortunate to diminish his import to the event and to golf as a whole.

So, as we sit in dreary New York awaiting Polar Vortex II, let's amuse ourselves with some of Mr. Hope's witticisms about the game we love:

1. "If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf." 
2. About Arnold Palmer: He’s the biggest crowd pleaser since the invention of portable sanitary facilities."
3. Recounting a conversation with Arnie: "He told me how I could cut eight strokes off my score…skip one of the par 3s.”
4. “It’s fun playing with (Jackie) Gleason. He has the only cart with a bartender. Have you ever seen Jackie riding around in his cart? It looks like a Goodyear blimp giving birth to a jeep. When he gets into a trap, the sand has to get out.”
5. "I've been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals."  
6. About Pine Valley:  "Foursomes have left the first tee here and have never been seen again. They just find their shoelaces and bags.”
7. President Eisenhower has given up golf for painting. It takes fewer strokes.
   Read more at http://www.golftoday.co.uk/noticeboard/quotes/bob_hope.html#5K4cBAeOPGcqboFz.99
   President Eisenhower has given up golf for painting. It takes fewer strokes.
   Read more at http://www.golftoday.co.uk/noticeboard/quotes/bob_hope.html#5K4cBAeOPGcqboFz.99
   

   President Eisenhower has given up golf for painting. It takes fewer strokes.
   Read more at http://www.golftoday.co.uk/noticeboard/quotes/bob_hope.html#5K4cBAeOPGcqboFz.99"
    "President Eisenhower has given up golf for painting.  It takes fewer strokes."
   
   President Eisenhower has given up golf for painting. It takes fewer strokes.
   Read more at http://www.golftoday.co.uk/noticeboard/quotes/bob_hope.html#5K4cBAeOPGcqboFz.99
8. “I joined Cypress (Point) a long time ago and haven’t played nearly as many rounds there as I would have wished. It’s such a beautiful place…It’s also very exclusive. Cypress had a very successful membership drive last month. They drove out forty members.”
9. "A photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and Stream." 
10. On the erratic game of Gerald Ford: "We have 51 golf courses in Palm Springs. He never decides which course he will play until after his first tee shot. 
    And that's just a brief sample.
    And lest you fall for his woe-is-me schtick about his golf game, he got his handicap as low as 4 and played in the 1951 British Amateur at Royal Porthcawl.