Tuesday, June 30, 2020

Tuesday Tastings

As I hinted at yesterday, the next two days involve morning golf.  Blogging will likely be a game-time call, dependent on whether anything appears that impels me to the keyboard.
Golf in the Time of Corona - A Continuing Feature - Listen up, everyone with a teetime at the Rocket Mortgage, please take one step forward.  Not so fast, Harris:
PGA Tour veteran Harris English withdrew from this week’s Rocket Mortgage Classic after testing positive for Covid-19, the PGA Tour said in a statement on Monday afternoon. 
“As part of the PGA Tour’s pre-tournament screening process this week at the Rocket Mortgage Classic, PGA Tour player Harris English tested positive for COVID-19 and has been withdrawn from the event.” 
English did not compete in last week’s Travelers Championship in Connecticut. The statement said the two-time Tour champion “will have the PGA Tour’s full support throughout his self-isolation period under CDC guidelines.” 
English is the fifth PGA Tour player to test positive for Covid-19 since the Tour returned to action three weeks ago at the Charles Schwab Challenge. Though no positive tests were recorded in the first week at Colonial, Nick Watney tested positive before the second round of the RBC Heritage, forcing him to withdraw from the event.
The blow cushioned by that sweet $100,000 stipend just, yanno, for the inconvenience.

Shack takes time out from his primal screams that "We're all gonna die" to question the sincerity of this from Harris English's statement:
“While it’s disappointing to receive this news, as I feel healthy, I’m pleased that the new safety protocols we have in place worked this week,” English said in the Tour’s press release about his WD. “I fully supported the Tour’s new rule of not allowing anyone on the tournament grounds until testing negative, as protecting others in the field and everyone affiliated with the tournament and the community should be the No. 1 priority as a result of a positive test. I appreciate the Tour’s support, and I look forward to competing again after I’m fully recovered.”
Here's Geoff's take:
The tournament lost several multiple players on Monday who had committed, with the PGA Tour announcing Harris English as the fifth player to test positive for COVID-19. He has withdrawn and will spend ten days in quarantine. His Whoop band apparently hasn’t arrived in the mail yet as the boilerplate statement only included the shameless homage to the Ministry of Sawgrass almost assuredly not uttered by English.
Geoff, may I suggest Ministry of Fear as a metaphorical alternative to your Ministry of Sawgrass, which doesn't carry the dystopian overtones of the iconic Graham Greene title.  No thanks necessary, I'm happy to pitch in where needed.

I, on the other hand, reveled in the logical inconsistencies.of the boilerplate testimony.  Harris seems to be focused appropriately on his recovery....  But, pardon the inconvenient question, recovery from what, exactly?  

We also have great news from Nick Watney, who remains stubbornly not dead:
Monday marked the 10th day of self-isolation for Nick Watney, the minimum required for PGA Tour players who test positive for the coronavirus. 
He said he is feeling good except for some minor fatigue, perhaps brought on by a major case of boredom, and except for the distinction of becoming the first of what now is five players and two caddies who have tested positive since the PGA Tour returned amid the COVID-19 pandemic.
He has that which Employee No. 2 has taken to calling Corona Brain.  Nick also had this to say:
"I will say, it's not the greatest feeling being the first to get it," Watney said in his first interview since he was notified June 19 at the the RBC Heritage of his positive test. 
"Some things are so vague around this thing," he said. "The symptoms ... some people get this, some get that. I haven't had a fever or cough the whole time, no shortness of breath. Maybe that's the reason it's so scary. I still don't know how or where I got it." 
He lost his sense of smell, a sensation he described as "gnarly," but said that is coming back. And perhaps the strangest sensation is being at a golf resort without playing golf.
First, you might well have been the first to test positive, though I doubt you were the first to get it.

But between English and Watney we can see the vague outline of the range of outcomes experienced by young, healthy people when infected with the virus.   That which I previously characterized as ranging between mild inconvenience and a nothingburger...

Lastly, Alan Shipnuck dropped his mailbag on Friday, one I've seen fit to ignore until now.  I'm old enough to remember when Friday was reserved for bad news dumps, it remains a mystery as to why Golf Magazine sees fit to bury it.  Alan had this on the subject du jour:
How many positive tests do you think would it take to shut down a tournament/pause the schedule? —@WallDwarf 
I fear we’re going to find out soon. The attrition in Hartford continues, and, given the incubation period of up to 14 days, the Tour has yet to feel the full effects of conducting a tournament amid the spring break atmosphere in Hilton Head. Commissioner Jay Monahan has refused to say what the threshold is for pulling the plug, which I understand. The decision-making doesn’t take place in a vacuum. When the PGA Tour was doing all the hard work to reconfigure its schedule the U.S. economy was largely shut down and the citizenry was sheltered in place. The Tour pressed forward forward, optimistically and ambitiously. It’s bad luck and bad timing that the tournaments restarted just as economic pain and politics compelled the “reopening” of public life and Americans collectively decided we were tired of fighting the virus.
With infection rates now spiking in 30 states, how long can the Tour play on? Most of the players live in raging hot-spot states Florida, Texas and Arizona. Many or even most of the pros are being vigilant but the traveling entourages are simply too big to control the spread of the virus. It’s not an accident that caddies figured in some of Hartford’s W/Ds. The loopers are subject to much less scrutiny than the players but they can just as easily bring the virus inside the ropes. The Tour lost two of the top-five players in the world at Hartford but played on. A lot of big-name players are now skipping next week’s Rocket Mortgage Classic; could be fatigue, or existential dread. In recent days we have seen even the most recalcitrant governors finally begin to acknowledge we are in the midst of a public health crisis and begin to take action. As infection rates continue to climb it is bad optics for the Tour to continue to barnstorm the country, taking Covid tests and other resources from the host communities. At what point does it become irresponsible? No wonder Monahan looks so hollowed-out these days.
Not only was this written in the midst of those positive tests, but Alan is on record as calling for the Tour to shut down as a result thereof.

Don't you just love that bit about politics compelling the end of the lockdowns?  Because once you start allowing folks out of their houses, where does this madness end?  Perhaps, Alan, you might want to consider the fact that folks aren't just tired?  Perhaps they're come to realize what a massive blunder the locksowns were.  Or maybe, they've woken to the fact that your scare-mongering over positive tests isn't working, given that those testing positive are at no risk.  Just food for thought....

Hartford Haze - Did the Travelers strike you as an event of sufficient magnitude that we should still be raguing its nuances 48 hours after its conclusion.  Yeah, me neither, bot for reasons that remain obscure, Dylan Dethier felt compelled to assign letter grades to...well, things like this:
Dustin Johnson’s 72nd-hole tee shot: A+ 
I dunno what to tell you about Dustin Johnson. The guy can look lethargic and he can look withdrawn and he can go most of two years with just one win and yet when you see that name at the top of the leaderboard, it feels wholly inevitable. When Dustin Johnson wins, it feels like he should always be winning. 
Johnson started Sunday two shots back but quickly overtook Brendon Todd, and whenever he needed a prime tee shot to secure things, he delivered, first after pumping one O.B. at 13 and particularly clinging to a one-shot lead on No. 18, where he explored previously unseen territory 350-plus yards down the middle. Ridiculous. 
Interestingly, D.J. didn’t win the event with his driver — he was top five in the field in strokes gained approach and strokes gained putting but just 46th in strokes gained off the tee, which Justin Ray reported was the lowest number of any win in his career.
Fair enough.  Though if we're grading 72nd hole tee shots, I'd put Oakmont 2016 in a different league than this.  Because, yanno, actual significance...

And this:
Rory McIlroy, relatively speaking: C+ 
We’re grading on the Rory Scale here, which is wholly unfair — we’ll happily to admit
that. This week was decidedly better than McIlroy’s finishes at Colonial (Sunday 74 to finish T32) or RBC (T41) but when the best player in the world fires an opening round of 63, it’s hard not to get your hopes up for something better than a T11.
Don’t just take my word for it, though: Listen to the words used by the man himself. “Frustrating.” “Rollercoaster-ish.” “Dumb mistakes.” You’d never know the guy played some pretty nice golf this week.
The good news is that nothing seems truly amiss in McIlroy’s arsenal. It’ll be all systems go in RoryWorld when he returns at Muirfield Village.
Yes, I certainly had my hopes set higher, specifically for one of Rory's patented backdoor top tens.  But it just so happens I have this browser tab open from a couple of weeks back:
  World No. 1 Rory McIlroy not worried about Sundays
As I understand his thinking, Rory isn't worried about Sundays because he's rendering them irrelevant.  Best part are those sweet, early Sunday tee times.

Regrets, I've Had a Few -  On the Venn Diagram depicting sports and economics, your tour guide for those overlapping sections should be John Ourand at the Sports Business Journal.  Alas, his work is behind a paywall, so all we can do is plagiarize legally excerpt those sections used by Shackelford under the doctrine of fair use.  This on the timing should come as no surprise:
Two months ago, after the USGA decided to postpone the U.S. Open to September, Fox Sports execs Eric Shanks and Larry Jones reached out to Pete Bevacqua and Jon Miller
at NBC Sports to see if their network -- which owns Golf Channel -- would be willing to carry some of this year’s event. Fox’s fall schedule is jam-packed, and it saw NBC as a potential lifeline to help it carry and sell one of golf’s four majors. Early in the discussions, it became clear that NBC wanted a bigger piece of the USGA package, and Fox wanted out.
Duh!  The NFL draws millions, whereas gold draws...well, pretty much just us kids.  Of course, the NFL playing is not a sure thing...

For those of us that remember the shock of the Fox contract, this was always the case:
Golf never fit Fox: Fox gets a bad rap for its golf production. The network’s performance at last year’s U.S. Open in Pebble Beach was praised widely. But golf never fit into Fox’s plans. The Fox execs that originally cut this deal -- Chase Carey and Randy Freer -- left the company soon afterwards, and nobody was left to champion the sport. Fox never was close to adding to its golf portfolio; it wasn’t a serious contender for either British Open or PGA Tour rights, which should have been the first sign that it wanted to get out of the USGA deal.
Welcome to the club, as there were many of us making this point back in the day.  Some of us were a little outraged at the USGA seemingly prioritizing the big check over the quality of the actual broadcast.  

Joe Buck is a gracious man, though I mostly agree with his thoughts here:


I liked many of their innovations, and many members of their broadcast team.  Brad Faxon first and foremost, but Ken Brown and Gil Hanse as well.  Being the geek that I am, just the addition of an architect to the team was such a good move...

The thing I hated most was, alas, Joe Buck.  Not Joe in tot, but mostly his voice, which after years of calling football is unsurprisingly too strong for our little game.

But, as Geoff notes at that post linked above, it's quite the writedown.

Golf in the Kingdom (of Fife) - Jim McArthur, the Captain of the Crail Golfing Society, has been e-mailing an update to his membership every Friday that the bride and I have been enjoying greatly.  He covers business for sure, but also interleaves humor and club history in a way that has allowed us to feel connected to our overseas club, notwithstanding that we've yet to play our first round as actual members.

From Jim's most recent missive, comes this news of a loosening in restrictions governing golf in Scotland:
I am pleased to inform members of the following changes to the published conditions effective from Monday 29th June 2020: 
- Members will be able to introduce an additional guest enabling a member to play with two guests, in line with the restriction of three households mixing. Members may introduce up to eight guests in one week.
- In addition, members can now book and play on Craighead from 2pm each day in either three balls or in four balls (which include golfers from no more than 3 households).
I would also like to take this opportunity to remind members of the travel guidelines issued by Scottish Golf:
“The updated regulations state that a “drive of broadly 5 miles is considered to be local”. The travel advice is for an individual to apply good judgement and not for the golf club to determine or police”.
Loosened perhaps, but not loose in any recognizable manner.  The restriction on travel is something I've never understood, given the safety of one's own vehicle and that we're awash in cheap oil., though they're also anticipating that it will be further relaxed this coming Friday  But this continues to puzzle:
At present the Clubhouse, the driving range, the practice putting greens, short game practice area and all toilets remain closed.
No doubt Scots are heartier souls  than we pampered Americans, but I had been reliably informed that bathrooms are a right bestowed upon us by our Creator...

Jim also informs of a birthday this week:
Next Friday 3 July 2020 is the 125th anniversary to the day of the opening of Balcomie Links. We had intended this year to have members competition to celebrate the event but like many other fixtures has had to be cancelled. This is another significant milestone in the history of the Society the background to which is as follows:
On the 3rd July 1895, before several hundreds of spectators, Balcomie Links were declared open for golf, the first ball being struck by Professor Chiene, a descendant of one of the founders of the Society and the second ball by the Father of Golf - Old Tom Morris.
When the Society was instituted in 1786, all golf was played on the narrow strip of shoreland at the north east end of Crail. It was part of Sauchope Farm and neither the Crail Town Council nor Crail Golfing Society had any title to the land although the inhabitants of the Royal Burgh of Crail played golf there long before the formation of the Society. Indeed Chambers Gazeteer of Scotland published in 1832 mentioned the existence of a golf club in Crail in 1760. In the early days the Society played over 8 holes at Sauchope and in 1872 another club the “East Neuk of Fife Golf Club” was formed and they played over the same links. The clubs amalgamated in 1894 and retained the name of Crail Golfing Society. The combined club was not satisfied with Sauchope Links and a committee was formed to look at developing land at Balcomie Farm and it was agreed to take the opinion of Old Tom Morris, who reported that the Balcomie Links were “very suitable for a nine hole course and I am bound to say that there is not a better in Scotland.”
Including this wonderful old photo looking down at the links and the abandoned lifeboat, which remains.


This all hits just as I've finally faced reality and cancelled our house rental in Fife.  Time to start thinking about the summer of 2021...

News and Notes - The Villages has long been a source of humor for many of us, most notably because of this.  Not that there's anything wrong with that, but there's everything wrong with every part of this story:
Did you ever dream you’d see a pro-Trump golf-cart parade full of angry old people battling other angry old people over a political candidate? The simulation is working overtime to provide us with all the evidence we need to wake up to the reality that we are living in some kind of dream state where jokes come true, everything is ridiculous, and battling grannies are the final stage before we all wake up in alien pods.

For some reason, the president thought this was fun and retweeted it and seemed not to realize one of the guys in the golf carts was shouting “white power,” either in an effort to annoy the protesters or because he believes it. Who knows? Still, neither side looks particularly good here. The grantifa granny in black is particularly foul, calling everyone a “f*cking Nazi,” which is ironic, since many of these people are old enough to have actually fought against actual Nazis. 
I find it hard to believe this actually happened. It’s like Twitter in real life. Is this performance art? A flashmob of idiocy? I can’t think of anything more ridiculous than senior citizens, who are supposed to be the wisest among us—the most seasoned, the most reasonable people of all—losing their minds like this. Apparently, we can’t count on anything anymore including the wisdom of our elders.
Grandtifa?  As the man says, are we done with 2020 yet?

Ski buddy Mitch Cohen sends this video of golfers protecting their turf.  It's most certainly NSFW, though we've pretty much done away with that "W", so it's all good:


Can't we all just get along?  Mind you, the punks had it coming, but I do love the old guy being able to outrun the young kid.

Future Shock - As you might have noticed, the mob has come for Lincoln and Washington in the last couple of weeks.  Also for Roosevelt, though frustratingly the wrong Roosevelt.... Yanno, not the one who interned Japanese citizens and refused to use the U.S. military to impede the holocaust.

But this is a golf blog, so where are their sights set in our game?  Ground zero, of course:
If you haven’t noticed, this country is changing by the day.

The racist names and symbols are going by the wayside quicker than you can keep up.

Statues of Confederate officers and slave owners have been toppled, not just here, but all over the world. No one’s horrible legacy is safe during the current movement against police brutality and systemic racists after the murder of George Floyd at the hands of a white cop in Minneapolis. 
People of all colors have taken to the streets demanding change from the powers that be, and, in some cases, made a change themselves. 
Recently, NASCAR did the unthinkable, banning the Confederate flag from its events. After all, that move is a direct slap in the face of the sport’s paying customers. It wasn’t an easy decision. It was simply the right choice.
This sounds great, where do I sign up?  Of course, the writer elides that not all the statues toppled fit this limited profile, as well as the other obvious issues of whether said mobs are reflective of the will of the people or just the more thuggish elements.

But here's their primary target in the golf world:
There’s a bigger one in the room that needs to be addressed, changed and removed.
The name “The Masters” must go. 
The heralded golf tournament, one of the four majors, needs to go back to its original name — the Augusta National Invitational. It became the Masters in 1939. 
Tiger Woods, other big-time golfers and corporate sponsorships should demand it. In the current climate, with all the sweeping changes, it’s only right and just. Best of all, in this case, it’s a simple and smooth fix. 
The Masters never felt good or even sounded good when you said it. 
And before we hear from the choir about tradition and history, save it.
Don't you love that last bit?  No dissenting opinions will be tolerated...  Who does he think he is?  A college professor? 

But maybe the best bit is his telling Tiger what he should think and do.  I know how Tiger has always loved that...  As for that "current climate"?  Most of us are hoping this will pass quickly, because if it doesn't, we'll not have much of a country left.

There is irony in the fact that the man that held out against the use of The Masters for this event was Bobby Jones, a southern patrician if there ever was one.  Jones' reasoning was quite different, he just thought the term "master" was too pretentious.

Alan Scat - Just a couple of bit from that mailbag referenced above.  Not his best week of work, but we can use some trifles to distract from the grim nature of the current news cycle:
What’s up with no Tiger? —@CodyColorado 
He’s playing the long game. If the show goes on, there’s a ton of important golf from early-August to mid-November so Tiger wants to make sure his body holds up. Beyond that, I think he is wisely sitting back and letting the Tour work out all the kinks in learning how to conduct tournaments in the Covid era. Tiger has always existed in a bubble of his own making and all the new rules and protocols are highly disruptive for such a persnickety personality. Why deal with all the hassles when he can chill at home with his kids and dogs and work on his game in his wondrous backyard?
Tiger not playing where Tiger never plays is a dog bites man story.  The only remaining curiosity was that Hilton Head Fake...

 I had actually forgotten that he was asked this as well:
Should the Masters change its name back to the Augusta National Invitational Tournament? #askalan —@GolfingBrock 
In the wake of all the recent social justice protests there has been a lot of talk about listening to and learning from perspectives that differ from your own. It never occurred to me that the Masters name is offensive to some people but now that it’s been pointed out I can certainly understand it, especially since Augusta National feels like the reproduction of an Old South plantation that has been airlifted in from Epcot Center. It would be a gesture of incredible sensitivity and inclusion for the green jackets to acknowledge the pain attached to the name of their tournament and go back to the original wording. It’s worth noting that Bobby Jones was never a fan of renaming his little invitational — he was embarrassed by the ostentatiousness of “Masters” and knew it wasn’t even accurate, since no one ever really masters golf.
Yeah, I'm about ready to see someone stand up to the mob.  Pretty clear it won't be Alan, so why not the poobahs at ANGC.  But anyone feeling pain from the name of a golf tournament has bigger problems to deal with for sure.
Is it time to give Webb Simpson his due?! Stacked field and he came out firing on the back 9 in the final round — might be a big rest of the year for him. #AskAlan —@EdNolan220 
For a long time Webb was the most underrated player in golf. Suddenly, he’s becoming overrated! The truth is that from 150 yards in he’s the most efficient and reliable player in the game. Obviously he doesn’t have the same firepower off the tee as other top players but the rest of Webb’s game has become so good, he’s now a threat every time he tees it up.
You're had an epiphany about a guy that's won a U.S. Open and a Players, as a result of a win in Hilton Head?  But isn't his due really, well, due him as a result of coming back from the ban on anchored putting?  
Was there ever any consideration to playing Tour events at elite courses that unfortunately won’t work for tour events? Bandon Dunes/Cabot Links to name a few in North America? —@KeithKhorton 
No, since the schedule was already locked in, including the venues. But if the Tour has to pause again it might be time to reimagine its business model in the short-term. Instead of traveling every week, why not post up at Bandon for five straight weeks and play an event on each of the excellent courses there? Then come to the 831 and play another five-week bender at Pebble Beach, Cypress Point, Spyglass Hill, Bayonet and Pasatiempo? Pinehurst, Long Island, Northern Michigan … the Tour could construct an incredible schedule while largely eliminating air travel.
Funny how folks keep mentioning Bandon, but those courses are so short that scoring would have been even crazier than we saw at Colonial and Hartford.
Bryson put on the weight/muscle first and foremost because of the Brooks Confrontation, right? It’s a bonus it seems to also have helped his game. Brooks was the favorite before, but wouldn’t you take Bryson now? #askalan —@mjcostel27 
I’ve thought about this, too! That was certainly an emasculating moment for Bryson, and I have no doubt that helped send him to the gym. Don’t forget, it was vanity that compelled Tiger to bulk up, too. Bryson has overdone it, as is his wont, and is now reaping the on-course benefits. The question becomes when will his body start breaking down, as happened to Tiger.
Funny, though I do agree with Alan's caveat...
Harbor Town Golf Links is a beautiful, iconic and memorable design but past its prime for today’s players and equipment. Agree? #AskAlan
—@GoranBarnes 
Every course on the planet has been rendered obsolete by modern distance gains. To offer any challenge at all requires an extreme, over-the-top setup and/or good luck with the weather, bringing steady winds and allowing for brick-hard greens. A few years ago I started saying that to test modern Tour pros a course needed to be 9,000-10,000 yards. People thought I was crazy but that’s now looking like a conservative estimate.
Firmandfast seems to be the only way to hold them back, and it's helpful if there's a wind as well.  Otherwise, yardage seems almost irrelevant...
#askAlan, What was the name of Joaquin Niemann’s punk/ska band in high school? (I mean just look at him. You just know he was in a punk band…) —@Laz_Versalles 
Hosel Rocket.
That was a potential name for this blog back in the day... 
Why is it so bad that a PGA Tour players uses profanity? It’s just a word. —@TheGhostOfHogan 
Part of the joy of The Last Dance was all the profanity — it was like listening to great jazz musicians jamming together. It’s always a delight when the boom mics capture Tour players cursing; it’s real, raw, relatable and offers a little insight to who they really are. In the age of rap music and the Internet, even kids are awash in profanity. (My sweet, innocent 13-year-old daughter can spit all the R-rated rhymes of Playboi Carti and Ski Mask the Slump God.) It’s time for the Tour and the networks to give the people what they want: more F-bombs.
Seems like CBS has been ahead of the curve on that...

I agree with all that both said, the issue becomes the kids.  Personally, I'm not offended and very much like the unscripted moments, and I also like to watch to see whether, like Tiger, they are able to get themselves back into game mode before reaching their ball.

But we also have to acknowledge that we want parents to bring their children to tournaments and watch golf on TV with their children, and I don't see how we square this circle.  

I shall leave you here and we'll spend some time together later this week.

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