Wednesday, April 10, 2019

Midweek Musings - Masters Edition

The dangers of sitting around, at the Masters or any other golf tournament, are numerous, for there are well-meaning but lacerating bores on all sides of you, always ready to pounce. 
DAN JENKINS
Pretty much everywhere, Dan, but we miss you already....

Family Values On Parade...   It was Karen Crouse of the N.Y. Times to whom Captain America admitted after the Ryder Cup tat X-Ray vision isn't one of his superpowers....  Get it?  That's why he was blindsided by being paired with Tiger.

Ironically Karen now tells us that the absence of said superpower is now a feature, not a bug:
As Patrick Reed surveyed his second shot, he seemed to have a dozen worries on his mind. 
Which way was the wind blowing? Where on the green should he land his ball? Would the fans in his peripheral vision stop moving? 
In a sport where the ball is still and the mind is active, and where distractions from unruly fans, bad bounces or sudden gusts of wind abound, focus can be difficult to maintain. But during the first round of the 2018 Tour Championship in Atlanta, it became nearly impossible. Reed took one last look at his target and what he saw nearly made his head go haywire. 
Why was his estranged father standing behind the green?
As an aside, I've been critical of Crouse's golf writing on several occasions, but that bit about the ball being still and the mind active might be her golfiest insight ever.   

The story just gets creepier and creepier:
Reed’s parents live six miles from Augusta National Golf Club, in a two-story, Southern-style Colonial replete with a bedroom shrine to their first child and only son, who hasn’t stepped foot in the house since 2012. This week should be a joyous homecoming for Reed, who led Augusta State (now Augusta University) to back-to-back national championships and will preside over Tuesday’s legends-laden Champions dinner. But instead it has all the makings of a nightmare, with his acrimonious relationship with his family threatening to become as much a part of this year’s Masters narrative as his attempt to become the first golfer since Tiger Woods in 2002 to successfully defend his title. 
“I wouldn’t at all be surprised if they show up,” Reed said. 
Reed, 28, has steadfastly declined to speak publicly about the reasons for the family schism. In a Sports Illustrated story in 2015, Reed’s mother insinuated that the rift resulted from Reed’s marriage, at age 22, to the former Justine Karain, against the advice of his parents who worried that he was too young.
I can see his point for sure.  His parents thought him too immature to get married, and I just can't see where they might have gotten that idea....

Crouse does have a couple of howlers, with which we can amuse ourselves.  First, this seems exactly wrong:
Reed knows his on-course persona makes him a convenient villain. He is the cocky player who speaks his mind and walks the course leading with his chin, the former college delinquent whose underage drinking and other immature behavior, which hastened his departure from Georgia after one year, continues to trail him as a pro.
Patrick's trouble seem mostly related to what comes out of his mouth....  His combative, game-face persona is about the only positive.

But this is the gem:
Rory McIlroy, who lost to Reed in a riveting singles match at the 2016 Ryder Cup and was paired with — and outplayed by — Reed in the final round of last year’s Masters, said: “The negative perception is all from hearsay, it’s all secondhand. I truly believe you can only base and judge someone’s character on how they’ve treated you. And Patrick’s always treated me well.”
Duh!  Rors, every time you come against him you fold up like a cheap card table....  I'm surprised he hasn't offered to take out your trash.

Whistling Past The...   Well, we'll see over the next few days.  I was struck by this upbeat assessment from a certain former champion:
Spieth isn’t coming into this year’s Masters in the kind of form folks have come to expect. His stock isn’t a sure thing, which is saying something given that Spieth has four
top-3 finishes in five starts at Augusta National, including that 2015 victory. 
Spieth said his expectations are no different this week than any other year. 
“I feel great about the state of my game right now,” he said. “I feel like my recent results aren’t a tell of where my game is actually at, and I feel I’ve made a lot of strides in the last couple days in the tee‑to‑green game, really just off the tee, my long game, which has been the only separation from being able to win golf tournaments over the last month or so.” 
Spieth feels like he’s under the radar, and he’s OK with that. In fact, he says he’s in a good place now for seeing the downs for what they are – inevitable.
It's not surprising that he's more upbeat about his chances and game than you humble blogger, because he hasn't had to watch himself out there.

Anthony Gulizia, whose name is new to me, takes the popular position that Augusta is the cure for what ails Jordan.  Though the data he cites is what an attorney would call an admission against interest:
After the WGC-Dell Technologies Match Play two weeks ago, Spieth's 48.2 percent driving accuracy ranked 213th out of 215 qualified players. His strokes gained tee-to-green (-.722) ranked 188th. He ranked in the top 10 in that metric in 2014-15. The 25-year-old also ranks 167th in strokes gained total (-.584) after previously ranking in the top five every season from 2014 to '17.


Egads, those are some ugly lines....  What's the opposite of a hockey stick?  Oh right, and upside-down hockey stick.

Mike Bamberger has a truly weird piece about our former hero:
What’s wrong with Jordan Spieth? All we know is there’s no going back
AUGUSTA, Ga. – Jordan Spieth, winner of the 2015 Masters and U.S. Open and the 2017 British Open but without a win since then, has to be the oldest 25-year-old Tour player ever. Arnold Palmer was 25 when he joined the Tour. Spieth speaks like a grown man, with a candor that has made him – for years now! – one of the freshest and most interesting voices in golf. At his late-afternoon press conference, he was asked how often he watches the 2015 Masters. Not often, he said. “I probably should watch it more.” 
The modern pro plays under scrutiny, and with a level of attention, that will flat-out age you, and could change you. These are issues that earlier generations of players knew nothing about. Jack Nicklaus could go into a pub British Open week and stand at the bar and be acknowledged, but not fussed over. A lot of the reporters covering ordinary Tour stops were out-of-season football writers. There was no Golf Channel looking to fill its many hours and players Tweeting out idealized versions of themselves. It’s hard to imagine there was once a world without GOLF.com and No Laying Up, etc., but there was. This is the world in which Jordan Spieth plies his trade. It can’t be easy. The golfer is more of a golfer, all day everyday, than he has been before.
I'm not exactly sure why Mike thinks he can't go back, though at least he can go home....  

Tiger Scat...  Luke Kerr-Dineen calls it an official freak-out:
The biggest news emanating from Tiger Woods’ press conference ahead of the 2019 Masters had nothing to do with the man himself. By all accounts, his life and game are in a good spot, and by all accounts, the 14-time major champ seems pretty happy with things. Instead, the real headliner from the press conference was Tiger Woods’ shirt logo. 
It was there for all to see: A cartoon logo of Frank, Tiger’s longtime headcover, on the left breast of his shirt.


Is Frank ready for his close-up?


Unplayable Lies:  Covering the important stories without fear or favor since 2014.

Another new-to-me ESPN scribe, Ian O'Connor in this instance, thinks we should chill because Tiger has no shortage of time:
AUGUSTA, Ga. -- Golf has Tiger Woods, which means golf has at least one advantage over the Big Three of the NFL, NBA and MLB. Tom Brady, LeBron James and Mike
Trout have no chance of competing and winning beyond their 50th birthdays. (Well, Brady might, but play along for the hell of it.) 
Tiger? He conceivably has as much as a 17-year window to add to his major championship total of 14. Tom Watson was closing hard on his 60th birthday when he stood one makeable putt away from winning The Open at Turnberry in 2009, and here is an indisputable fact about the iconic Mr. Watson: 
He was never as good a golfer as Tiger Woods. Not even close.
There are many differences between Tiger and Watson...  Another important one is that I don't ever remember Tom being injured.  Tiger's had more surgeries than Watson has majors.... in fact he might end his career with more surgeries than majors.

O'Connor cites lots of history, but it's always Phil, Vijay, Player and Watson, all guys with long, fluid swings that don't put near the stress on the body that Tiger's does (or at least used to).  

Dave Shedloski tells us that which we already knew, that Tiger isn't the longest guy out there, and will therefore have to do it using the old noggin:
Surgically repaired back and all, Woods still is long enough to hold his own against
today’s bombers, and he picked up a few more yards after putting a lighter shaft in his driver for the WGC-Dell Technologies Match Play two weeks ago. The key will be putting to use what he called, “a pretty good little library in my head.” 
“Throughout the years,” he added, “I accumulated a lot of knowledge how to play it under different conditions and playing practice rounds with guys who have won here a lot, who understand how to play it. And then to be a part of the entire process of having to compete as they have evolved the golf course and trying to understand how to play it, it changes from when they do change a few things and having to adjust that.” 
In other words, few participants know the course better. “I know I can play this golf course. I’ve had some success here.”
He hasn't won one of these in fourteen years, and I can't honestly recall when he was last a factor on Sunday....  So sure, he could win I guess.  I just have a little trouble imagining it.

Tread Lightly... John Feinstein is hawking the importance of this week to DJ, about which I'm ambivalent:
If Dustin Johnson showed up for his pre-Masters press conference on Tuesday afternoon and announced he’d had enough of the golf grind and was retiring at age 34, he could
walk off into the Augusta sunset knowing his next metaphorical stop would be the World Golf Hall of Fame. He’s won 20 times on the PGA Tour, one of those victories coming at the 2016 U.S. Open. He’s played on four U.S. Ryder Cup teams and come achingly close to winning a couple more majors. Enough said. 
Assuming though that he doesn’t call it quits and tees it up Thursday at Augusta National for his ninth Masters appearance, the case can be made that the 34-year-old from Myrtle Beach, S.C., is under as much pressure as any of the 87 players in the field this week, save perhaps for Rory McIlroy who will be taking his fifth shot at completing the career Grand Slam. 
Why? Because there are Hall of Famers and there are HALL OF FAMERS.
John goes through DJ's greatest hits, if you can bear it.  Obviously whatever happened two years ago might have taken his best shot from the guy, but I don't completely agree with John:
Two years ago, Johnson arrived at Augusta as close to an overwhelming favorite as anyone had been since the Tiger Woods 1.0 Era ended. He had won his last three starts—in Los Angeles, in Mexico and at the WGC-Match Play. The only surprise in those three wins was that Jon Rahm had gamely taken him to the 18th hole in the match-play final. 
Augusta National has always been a course that should fit Johnson’s game, and yet he’s never seriously contended—although he finished T-4 in 2016 two months prior to his breakthrough U.S. Open win at Oakmont. Then, 48 hours before the 2017 tournament began, came the bizarre slip on the steps and his withdrawal the day before the Masters was to begin.
DJ is a great player with amazing physical skills, but I don't find Augusta the best fit for him.  He's a little suspect on fast greens, Oakmont notwithstanding, and he strongly favors that lovely butter cut....  Perfect for approach shots, but he'll need to turn the ball over off the tee.

 Also, it needs to be said, he's not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer....  Discipline, patience and course management aren't his compelling strengths.

Who Ya Got?...  I have to make my picks in Bluto's pool later today, so I'd better pay close attention.  Do we think this guy might be over-promising?
Masters 2019: Presenting our annual can't-miss, sure-fire choice to win* the Masters
Hmmm, well at least he's using a thoroughly scientific methodology.... You're not a science denier, are you?
Now, all that would have been fine, but I got distracted by the burdens of numerology, which as it turns out, is not “science” in the way "Pepto Bismol" is not “how to get through the afternoon.” Trouble was, I noticed that each of the last five Masters winners seemed to have shortish surnames. No one longer than seven letters, but none shorter than five. Indeed, the median for the length of the last name of the winner of the Masters since 2000 is six letters—even with three "Mickelson"s and a "Schwartzel," which strangely enough is not one of the required movements in Olympic Ice Dancing. But oh, it should be, dear children, it should be. 
Sanity prevailed (sort of), so I didn’t weight these six criteria equally. Shrewdly (or so I thought), strokes-gained/approach, strokes-gained/putting, Par 5 Birdie or Better and Best Masters Finish accounted for 90 percent of your final score. But it doesn’t seem accidental that my choice has a six-letter last name. Now that you mention it, it seems kind of creepy. Like if Jordan Peele were picking the winner of the Masters, or if he were hosting your Masters party. Or if he were just at your house, cutting out coupons with a really big pair of golden scissors. Well, maybe not that creepy.
Spoiler alert, the key bit was prior success at this venue:
In fact, now that I think about it my pick is pretty obvious and disappointing at the same time. (In other words, it's my usual crazy pick.) Still, he's a great player, former beloved
champion, still comfortably in his prime. Then again, I’m not even sure he wants to be a tour player anymore, even though he has two top-fives this year and six top-20s (the same number he had the last time he won). But I mean the guy recently said that he hoped to be an assistant captain on the Presidents Cup team that goes to Australia in December—not be on the team, mind you, just drive a cart. Heck, the guy’s in the top 20 in both Par 5 Birdie or Better for the season and strokes-gained/putting for his last event, hits it 400 yards (look it up) and currently is ranked ahead of last year’s Masters champ in the Official World Golf Ranking. That's of golfers, not cart drivers. And he wants to be in charge of getting Gatorade and Vegemite sandwiches for the caddies? Really. C’mon, Bubba, step up.
Yes it is and no I can't.

Want the skinny from some insiders?  Stephen Hennessy with picks:
PGA Tour Caddie Guest Picker of the Week: Rory McIlroy (7-1) — As much as I dislike the word “trending,” I’m going to use it here. Things are truly trending Rory’s way. After a couple of quiet seasons—by Rory’s standards—he seems to be back in world-class form. Statistically, there’s not many players better than him right now. He leads in strokes gained/driving on the PGA Tour as well as strokes gained/total. Combine this with a solid performance history at Augusta—four top-10s the past four appearances—and Rory will be hard to beat this week. As added motivation to win—as if anyone needs that at Augusta National—a victory would make Rory just the sixth player in history to complete a Career Grand Slam. In all his past attempts of earning the elusive Grand Slam, this is his best chance. I have reason to believe he gets it done.
Were you not at the Match-Play?  Did you miss last year's Masters?  

I'm more of a Rory skeptic, but see what you think of this one:
Meditation, juggling and self-help books? Why Rory McIlroy finally feels comfortable at Augusta National
Juggling?  Mr. Diamond has his hands quite full....

Here's the full range of prognostications:
This guy tells us that the secret is in the dirt stats:
Good news Tiger Woods fans: It is a fallacy that the Masters is a bit of a haven for bombers. Sure, some long hitters such as Bubba Watson have won the event in recent years, but if you’re looking for a key stat that points to success at Augusta National, it’s greens in regulation. Over the past 10 Masters, the champion's average rank for the week compared to the field was just about eighth (7.6) in greens in regulation (compared to 16.8 in driving distance).
GIR's, sure. though I'm still thinking of players with six-letter names..... The problem is that any stat gives you wheat, Tiger, JT and perhaps Kooch, but lots of chaff as well, Woodland and Chucky Three-Sticks.

One guy I'm steering clear of is Brooks Koepka, who recently did something that's hard to imagine:
The reigning PGA Tour Player of the Year attributes that to some minor health issues that began at the Players last month. “Just had a bunch of blood work and trying to figure out
what was going on. The diet I was on was probably not the best,” Koepka admitted. “I was like 1,800 calories a day. I mean, you’re not going to be in the best physical shape at that point. You look at somebody like Michael Phelps or somebody like that eating 6,000 or 7,000 calories by lunch time. But I wanted to do it and try to lose some weight, and maybe went about it a little too aggressively for just a long period of time and the intensity of what I was doing.” 
One possible reason for Koepka’s intense effort to get lean: according to reports, the famously buff golfer will appear in the buff in ESPN’s Body Issue, which will be released later this summer.
Say what?  Apparently he lost 30 lobs. so he'd look good in and out of his Speedo....  WTF!  I guess it's easy to see why he and DJ get along so well, as neither should quit their day job to become rocket scientists.

I think I have my pick, but there's no need to jinx it through public disclosure....

The USGA and R&A have introduced a new Local Rule that should put a smile on Justin Thomas’ face. 
After holding a regular quarterly meeting this past weekend of the Joint Rules Committee, the governing bodies announced a clarification on Tuesday to the new Rules of Golf that will restore a player’s ability to replace a broken or significantly damaged club during a round, except in cases of abuse. 
Under a newly established Local Rule, a club is “broken or significantly damaged” if it meets the following conditions:
• the shaft breaks into pieces, splinters or is bent (but not when the shaft is only dented)
• the club face impact area is visibly deformed (but not when the club face is only scratched)
• the clubhead is visibly and significantly deformed
• the clubhead is detached or loose from the shaft, or
• the grip is loose 
However, a player is not allowed to replace his or her club solely because there is a crack in the club face or clubhead.
So, the purpose of that long comment period was?  There's been am awful lot of this, and it seems highly amateurish.  But I'm also chuckling at the fact that our worldwide governing bodies are fixing their rules mistake through local rules.  

Can't anyone here play this game?

Enjoy the Par-3 and I'll see you tomorrow.

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