I am safely ensconced in Unplayable Lies World HQ and prepared to review this weekend's exciting golf action... What? No action? No worries, we'll just make crap up as we usually do....
R.I.P. - If you're of a certain age, you'll remember this guy:
Former PGA Tour winner and course designer Forrest Fezler died at the age of 69 on Friday in Tallahassee, Fla., after battling brain cancer.His best year came in 1974, when he won the Southern Open, his lone Tour title. His best finish at a major also came in 1974, when he placed second to Hale Irwin at the U.S. Open at Winged Foot. During his career, the California-native had 30 top-10 finishes and eight runner-up finishes.
In 1973, Fezler earned PGA Tour Rookie of the Year honors. But injuries would hamper him for much of his career and force Fezler to have to adjust both his swing and the number of tournaments he played in.
Like many, however, Fezler's career was defined by one minor instance of rebellion against The Man:
Fezler’s most iconic moment as a professional came during the final round of the 1983 U.S. Open at Oakmont. In between the 17th and 18th holes, he ducked into a port-a-pottyand changed into Bermuda shorts for the final hole. “I went brain dead for a few minutes of my life and it brought me publicity for 30-some years,” Fezler said to the Denver Post after his infamous moment. “I’m glad I did it.”
Fezler had long said that he pulled the stunt because he disagreed with the USGA’s course set-ups, but he told GOLF.com in 2015 that he actually did it in response to bad officiating he had faced two years earlier.
I can only hope that Phil is taking notes, because THAT'S how you stick it to the USGA.
R.I.P.
Busted - I see no reason that he couldn't have finished his work by telecommuting from his new residence:
Three days after golf course architect Keith Foster pled guilty to federal charges of illegally transporting between $250,000 and $500,000 in items made from endangered species, his most high-profile golf client has fired him.
Congressional Country Club president Bev Lane sent a letter to the membership on Saturday announcing that the Board of Governors at the Bethesda, Md., club had terminated their contract with Foster and is in the process of looking for a replacement to move forward with renovation work on the Blue Course that had been expected to begin in Fall 2019.
In the letter, first reported by the Fried Egg and a copy of which has been obtained by Golf Digest, Lane stated that the club had no prior knowledge of Foster’s legal issues. In addition to his work as an architect, Foster owned a family antiques business in Virginia that specialized in selling foreign-sourced merchandise, a portion of which included wildlife products made from endangered species such as crocodiles, sea turtles and sawfish.
Foster had been hired by Congressional to help oversee a restoration of the Blue course to original 1924 Devereux Emmett plans ahead of a number of national events the club will host in conjunction with the PGA of America.
Given my ambivalence over the venue, I wouldn't much care except that the PGA of America has made a rather large bet:
In a deal signed in September, the club agreed to be the site of eight PGA of America championships over a 15-year period. They include the Ryder Cup (2036), the PGA Championship (2031), the KPMG Women’s PGA Championship (2022, 2027) Senior PGA Championship (2025, 2033) PGA Professional Championship (2029) and the Junior PGA Championship (2024).
And, of course, those hits keep on coming:
UPDATE -- 1:45 p.m. ET: The Fried Egg is reporting that Olympia Fields has also cut ties with Foster. The Chicagoland course, which hired Foster in May, was just awarded the 2020 BMW Championship.
I say let the man finish these gigs before doing his time. After all, if he can make Congressional and Olympia Fields interesting, then he's kind of a God and Trump should pardon him.
Riddle Me This, Batman - Golf Digest has some fun with a year-end quiz, including the following:
6: What penalty did the USGA give Phil Mickelson for hitting a moving ball duringthe U.S. Open?
A: No penaltyB: Two-stroke penaltyC: DisqualificationD: Forced him to watch himself doing the worm for 24 hours, Clockwork Orange style.
Hey, who can pass up a Clockwork Orange reference. This might actually be the funniest bit, though it's awfully inside baseball:
11. This happened for the first time on the European Tour in 2018:
A: An amateur won a tournament titleB: A woman won a tournament titleC: A player shot a 59D: Keith Pelley wore simple, dark-framed glasses
Just Google it....
The Next Big Thing - The Tour has this cooked up for folks in March:
Want to see Tiger shape shots in person without losing the convenient features thatenhance a TV broadcast? Head to TPC Sawgrass in March. The PGA Tour will roll out Toptracer technology at The Players, giving on-site fans (for the first time) a chance to watch on giant video boards as the best players in the world carve their golf balls on the practice range.
I'm not quite sure why we need the tracer lines for folks sitting close enough to follow the ball, but perhaps they'll also give club and ball speeds and the like.
In a companion item, apparently we won't be hitting on your grandfather's range:
Golf is in a steady state of evolution, but every now and then there’s a revolution — like the modern-day disruption of the driving range. What began in 2001 with Topgolf and itshigh-tech golf-meets-entertainment venues has given way to full-blown gamification. Banging balls is no longer just for wannabe Ben Hogans. Practice is diversion, and the other way around. The trend is evident in pocket-sized mobile apps like Trackman Range, which allows range-goers to trace their shots — and partake in target contests against their friends — with NASA-like precision; and in spinoff concepts like Topgolf’s Toptracer Range, a bundle of cameras, screens and sensors that can turn a plain old range — or a big-league one — into a golf-themed arcade. Throw in the rise of simulator-culture, with hitting booths that double as social hubs installed in airports, hotels and corporate campuses, and you can see where the arc of history is headed. Your grandpa’s idea of a good time on the range won’t meet your grandkids’ standard for having fun.
Meh! The technology is amazing and the near-golf experiences it allows are great, but the ubiquity of it seems overstated. The vast majority of us will continue to experience the range in an old school manner.
Confidentially Yours - The Golf.com writes gave up 60 Minutes to participate in their weekly confab, offering up some moderately interesting bits:
1. Canadian pros Mackenzie Hughes and Graham DeLaet recently took to Twitter to voice their opinions on certain rules changes for 2019, and not all of them were flattering. “I think they were trying to simplify the game but after watching them explain the new rules I don’t think they accomplished that,” Hughes said, pointing to the new dropping procedure which players to drop from knee height and the provision that allows players to replace damaged clubs mid-round. Added DeLaet: “How they didn’t address the anchoring definition is absurd.” What kind of impact do you think the new rules will have on Tour next year? Are they likely to bring more clarity or controversy?
John Wood: No difference, at least on tour. Yes, I think in general the new rules will make things easier, but with how much is at stake during every decision involving a rule, most of the guys will still call in rules officials for most rulings. Should the players (and their caddies) know the rules enough to do things on their own? Probably, but there’s just too much at stake to risk it.
Sean Zak: As with all change, it’ll feel (and look) weird at first, but let’s not forget what we said right away: the new rules were better. Nothing has changed! We’ll need three or four months of play to really see how awkward or clear these decisions end up being for the pros. I’m not going to let the opinions of two pros (they play a different game) make me think any differently about the rules changes that haven’t even gone into effect yet.
I mostly agree, as the big boys don't often double-hit (we only remember T.C. Chen because it was such an oddity) or lose balls. The one aspect to watch may be the grooming of putting lines...
Dylan Dethier: The drop-from-the-knee thing is a visual that will be a little strange to get used to. The pin in on the green thing even more so. But I think there will be about the same number of controversies, just slightly different ones now (see Woods, Tiger at the Hero). Love the outspoken Canadians, though!
Michael Bamberger: Controversy in the short-term and clarity in the long-run. Modestly on both counts. Except for the pin in, there’s nothing here that changes the game in any fundamental way.
Josh Sens: It’s like emergency workers say–you’re always preparing for the last disaster. A lot of the problems we saw in recent years have been smartly addressed, but we’ll hit other snags that we can’t possibly foresee now. Meantime, still waiting for a rigidly enforced shot clock, a change that would do the game more good than any other I can think of.
Yeah, forgot Bryson and leaving the pin in..... But isn't "Outspoken Canadian an oxymoron?
Next they tackle the issue of the day:
2. Our Josh Berhow dug up the complaints filed to the FCC during golf telecasts in the last three years. There were no grievances in 2016 and ’17 but nine in 2018, most triggered by foul language uttered by golfers. In your experience as both an on-site reporter and on-the-couch viewer, does pro golf have a profanity problem?
Wood: S*!t no. This is just my personal feeling, but they’re just words. Can anyone out there honestly say they’ve never cursed on the golf course in a fit of anger? If a few slip out during a broadcast, I think it shows professional golf in a truer sense. Of the millions and millions of people who watched golf all year long on TV, nine felt aggrieved enough to lodge a complaint. I can live with that. But I’ve also been known to look up old on field baseball battles between Earl Weaver or Tommy Lasorda and an umpire (if you don’t mind cursing, run to YouTube and enjoy) and watch for hours on end, so maybe I’m not a fair judge.
Heh! Let me just say that I'm taken back to our days at Cabot last September. Our room was essentially next to the landing area of tee shots on the 18th hole of Cabot Links, and we watched and listened as the late afternoon groups finished. The language of players as they hit their approach shots was quite amusing.... Not terribly imaginative, mind you, as they demonstrated an over-reliance on one particular word.....
Zak: If anything, pro golf would have a microphone problem, not a profanity problem. But that’s the price you pay when you want to hear Tiger say, “Talk to me, Joey,” or “One yard!” And last I checked, NINE people deciding to write in is not a substantial group.
Dethier: We need MORE microphones, not fewer. I can’t tell if Zak is mocking or not (a recurring problem around the office), but that player-caddie interaction is the good stuff. Players should expect whatever they say during a shot will be caught on tape (and act accordingly) but these were more amusing than offensive in my book.
Bamberger: Profanity is a sign of honesty and showing that you care. It is also the test of good vocabulary, when used appropriately. Professional golf does not have a problem here.
I actually find myself very conflicted on this point. Like the writers, I don't have any problem with the profanity, and love the improvement in audio on golf telecasts. On the flip side, however, we do want kids to watch and kids tend to have parents....How about a baseball story?
Sens: This is very much off-topic but John’s mention of Lasorda reminds me of one of my favorite baseball stories, relayed to me by a longtime Dodgers reporter. Often, when Lasorda went to the mound, he was just making a show of things (that’s part of the managerial code–you make a demonstration in defense of a player, say), and what looked to us on TV like Lasorda going ballistic was actually Lasorda saying to the ump, “Have you tried the manicotti at such-and-such restaurant? It’s unbelievable.” The ump would then toss Lasorda to complete the stage play. And after the game, he’d follow up on Lasorda’s manicotti recommendation. But back to the topic at hand. . . I’m with Michael. There’s no problem, except perhaps that the blue language is not nearly creative enough.
And how about a tease of the year to come:
4. Don’t look now, but the Masters is less than four months away, and the hallowed design at Augusta National is in good company: Bethpage Black (PGA), Pebble Beach (U.S. Open) and Northern Ireland’s Royal Portrush (British Open). Is this the best major rota in recent memory, and which week are you most amped for?
Wood: Pretty awesome. I’m always beyond amped for Augusta, and I’m especially amped for Royal Portrush, which I’ve never seen but is universally acknowledged as one of the best. I’m, what’s the word I’m looking for….Hopeful? for Pebble Beach. I’m aNorCal guy and I think a U.S. Open at Pebble is the pinnacle of the Championship, but I’d be lying if I said I was anything but a bit trepidatious about how the USGA will set it up. And Bethpage Black is another favorite, but that week will be dictated by weather. If we can get a reasonably warm forecast and a firm and fast course, then it will be as good as it gets.
Zak: It’s pretty damn good. Hopefully the golf is just as good. Most excited for Pebble. Never been there before. Heard it’s pretty solid 😉
Dethier: Oh yeah, these are four big-time winners. Only thing missing is something from golf’s new-school innovative course designs. Looking ahead, maybe a spot opens up in 2032?
Bamberger: It’s a spectacular lineup, especially for glory’s last shot, at Portrush. And let’s not forget about the Players at the Stadium course in March.
Gotta be Portrush, because it's rare to get a new venue in that event.... and it's so damn good. Plus, even for those of us that know it, we have those two new holes.
This is a pretty good question on which to exit:
6. Happy holidays! In this season of giving, give our readers one insidery golf insight from 2018 that they’re unlikely to know about.
Insidery? Shouldn't it be insiderish?
Wood: Trying to come up with something from my point of view, the caddie, and the number one thing that comes to mind is how amazing the guys who make our yardage books are. The level of skill, of detail, they put into these is beyond incredible. When I started, the books, while valuable, were extremely basic. Mark Long, who makes the books for the PGA Tour, and Dion Stevens, who makes them in Europe, are not well known names in the golf world, but week in week out their work has so much to do with everyone’s successes on tour.
Does John know about the green-reading book ban?
Zak: One elite Tour player’s chef believes they save him one-third of a shot a round just by cooking for him on the road. Not sure I can validate that, but I love the thought.
Dethier: In a pitch that didn’t pass muster, according to my editors, I broke down the best golfers by first name. It was a simple formula: average world ranking of the top three players of that name. For you inquiring minds, “Pat/Patrick” ranked the best, with Reed (No. 15), Cantlay (No. 18) and Perez (No. 40) averaging out to 24.3. Alexander (Schauffele, Noren, Bjork) and Justin (Rose, Thomas, Harding) tie for 2nd at 30.3. Bet you didn’t know THAT!
Bamberger: The order of play on the first tee on the PGA Tour in a Thursday and Friday threesome goes by who has won on Tour most recently. If there are no winners, the default is career money, with the highest earner going first. At home, we just flip a tee, and it points to the day’s first victim.
Sens: As a measure of comfort, I like this stat: from 150 yards, the average Tour pro leave is 23 feet from the pin. Ask the average golfer, and they’ll almost always guess that Tour pros stick it much closer from that distance—another reminder that we regular old duffers set absurd standards for ourselves and should spare ourselves the self-abuse when we don’t knock down the flagstick.
Hey, I warned you it was only moderately interesting....
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