Back To Regular Programming

I'm sure this will come as something of a relief to the reader, but it's time to resume our normal programming.  Oh, we're still pick a bit at the deceased corpse, but we'll mix in some other stories from the wider golf world, including some we've missed:

This Week in Albatrosses - The vast majority of you have already seen this, but I just don't care.  Golf has never had an equivalent to baseball's walk-off home run, at least up until now.  Imagine for a moment that you're two shots behind on the iconic eighteenth fairway at Pebble Beach.  Here's how you handle that situation in case you're in doubt:

A walk-off albatross is pretty boss, but to do it at Pebble on television is just beyond belief.  It was apparently a 4-iron from 203 yards, though I just wish he had a nicer guy than Lee Janzen as his partner.

This Week in Scorecard Mishaps - There's just gotta be a better way, no?  Since Roberto DeVincenzo was such a stupid, we continue to see these stories, though I'm not at all clear what happened here:

It will be a long flight home for England’s Holly Clyburn. She was disqualified after the

The unfortunate Holly Clyburn.

first round of Stage II of LPGA Q-School because the marker failed to sign Clyburn’s card. Clyburn, a second-year player on the Ladies European Tour, shot 71 on Plantation Golf & Country Club’s Panther Course in Venice, Fla. 

Sue Witters, the LPGA’s vice president of rules and competition, said volunteers in the scoring tent told Clyburn that the addition on her card was good and then Clyburn slid the card over to Australian amateur Justine Lee to get a second signature. 

“Justine just flat out whiffed it,” Witters said.

What does she mean when she says that Lee "whiffed it?"  All I can deduce from what follows is that Lee was arguing about her own score and forgot to sign it, though whiff to me means to swing and miss (our second baseball reference of the morning).

I've never been one who thought the rules of golf are a big problem, though I might make an exception in this instance.  Obviously you need the signature of the player and the marker, though I don't see any risk to the field in allowing this to be rectified after the fact, say before play commences the next day.  But the injustice is that the penalty is assessed against the wrong player, as it's Lee that failed in her obligations as a marker.

This Week in Stevie Nonsense - How can we miss you if you won't go away?  For reasons best left to the confessional, Pravda's Karen Crouse takes this long gauzy look at the trials of Steve, don't call me Stevie, Williams, retired looper (though the piece was written before that was known.  A little bit of history about how his great luggage toting career began:

Stevie with an unidentified golfer back in the day.

Williams’s life changed when he was 13 and his father, a fine amateur golfer, arranged for him to caddie for the Australian star Peter Thomson in the New Zealand Open. Thomson finished third. 

“From that week on,” Williams said, “I knew I wanted to be a professional caddie.”

That's actually kinda cool, though most Americans will necessarily not connect with how great Peter Thompson was and how important he would have been to a New Zealander of that era.

Stevie went on to loop for Greg Norman, Ray Floyd and some guy named Woods, as you might have heard.  But what has the wags abuzz is this from an unbylined AP story:

Asked if he would be prepared to work with Woods again, Williams said "he's definitely someone I'd consider." 

"He's a tremendous talent, but it's hard to say right now because it's only two weeks since I've hung up the clubs," Williams said.

How do you keep the battered spouses from returning to their abusers?  Stevie, take a clue from Butch who had this to say after Tiger canned Sean Foley, "He won't call and I wouldn't do it."  Isn't that more satisfying, since Tiger's in an exclusive caddie-player relationship.

This Week in Ryder Cup Saviors - They're now thinking so far out of the box that it's getting quite silly... How about these suggestions:

• Gary Williams nominates ex-Deutsche Bank CEO Seth Waugh as the appropriate "change

  

  Seth Waugh with the Frito bandito.

  agent," though it's unclear as to exactly what job that is.  But he does a reasonable job on the problem diagnoses, and unlike some seems to know the difference between the two PGA's.

• Jay Coffin believes the model that leads us out of the wilderness is that created by Jerry Colangelo for USA Basketball.  Though like Alan Shipnuck earlier he gives us this gem:

Time to blow the box up and live outside it. The U.S. needs to find someone to commit to a four-year stint as captain of Team USA Golf. This would allow one person to captain the U.S. for a home and away Ryder Cup and a home and away Presidents Cup.

OK Jay, but you're gonna have to explain to Commissioner Ratched why his President's Cup is broken, as the guys tend to play very well in HIS event.

• Doug Ferguson is smart enough to stay out of the nomination business, but he has some strong opinions as to who shouldn't take the job: 

Paul Azinger is not ruling out a return as Captain America in the Ryder Cup.

But that’s not what America needs. 

And neither does Azinger. 

His reputation only grows each time the Americans fail. Why would he want to risk that when there is no guarantee of reward? With so much focus on a dysfunctional U.S. team, it’s easy to overlook that Europe might have been the stronger side, anyway.

True that, though remarkably similar to the advice I would have conveyed to Tom Watson two years ago.  But it's really hard to say no when they tell you you're the only one that can save this...

In his post aggregating these pieces, Shackelford comes up with an even further outside the box candidate for savior:

Anything to say about him, Phil?

And I’m pretty sure at this pace Pope Francis is next on someone’s list.

Geoff, Geoff, Geofff.....c'mon, you know that the pontiff is from Argentina and, as such, he's only eligible for the President's Cup.

This Week in Failed Business Models - The Back9 Network launched this week, and I'm sure you're hard-pressed to control your excitement.  For those with a life, this is anew "golf lifestyle" network that has had, shall we say, a troubled infancy.  The network has just gone live on DirectTV, but as the Hartford Courant tells us, there's no end to the litigation:

The state-subsidized Back9Network plans to start broadcasting on satellite television

Back9's Jamie Bosworth.

Monday under a new deal with DirecTV that will move it beyond its status as an online-only provider of "golf-lifestyle" content — but it is wrestling with claims of broken legal commitments and sexually oriented impropriety. 

Back9 is being sued by an Emmy Award-winning former executive vice president at the company, Robert Abbott, who seeks $2.2 million and says that Back9 breached his contract by using false justifications in telling him he was being fired after less than a year in September 2013. 

Moreover, in a July 31 document filed at Superior Court in Hartford, Abbott's lawyer asked Back9 to admit or deny the following assertion: "The defendant [Back9] used a significant amount of its resources to pay off employee(s) who reported sexual misconduct by its CEO."

That would be founder and former CEO Jamie Bosworth, whose own lifestyle seems to be the crux of the matter.  Let's waste a few more pixels on this and juxtapose two more excerpts from this most recent bad press, first this:

Abbott isn't the first person who worked at Back9 to sue the company alleging that it failed to honor its commitments. Steve Shaw, a consultant for Back9 who held the title of vice president, claimed in a 2013 lawsuit that the company owed him tens of thousands of dollars after laying him off, despite assurances that he would be hired full time. That suit was settled earlier this year under undisclosed terms. 

Back9 has faced questions connected to the sexual nature of its content. In November 2013, the company issued an apology for a video on its website in which the then-CEO's wife, Jennifer Bosworth, made sexual references and used vulgar language. Further criticism arose this past April over sexually charged content on the Back9 website — a photo of four scantily clad women, including Jennifer Bosworth, that was posted on Instagram.

And this:

Back9 has received more attention than some start-up companies, partly because of a controversial state economic development package of $5 million — which was part of the $30 million in overall financing raised by the company. 

The company's deal with the state Department of Economic and Community Development has included a $100,000 grant and $250,000 loan in 2012 under the Small Business Express Program, and two loans under the agency's Manufacturers' Assistance Act program, one in 2012 for $750,000 and one in 2013 for $4 million, for which payments are deferred until 2017 and 2018.

You see the problem...well, it's only a problem if you're a Connecticut taxpayer.  So am I being needlessly pessimistic to assume that this venture will fail miserably?  You be the judge after viwing this promo.

Come to think of it, I have DirectTV in my Park City rental so if they're still on the air I might have some fun with it then.

This Week In Greater Europe - In light of my love of The European Union, Shack had a devastatingly funny item from the BBC from Holywood, Northern Ireland, hometown of a certain prominent Euro Ryder Cupper:

The flag-waving golf fan, who did not wish to be named, said: "I was having a house-warming party and decided to put up the European flag for the Ryder Cup. 

"I was tidying up on Sunday morning and two police officers arrived. They didn't seem to know what the flag was themselves. 

"I said 'it is a European Union flag for the Ryder Cup'. 

"They said there'd been a complaint about it being some sort of Arabic flag.

"I just laughed. In the end they were laughing too. It was crazy."

How's that ever closer union working out for ya?

This Week in Classic Golf Course Design -  We've been justifiably tough on Phil Mickelson this week, so I'm pleased to inform you that the lad is apparently every bit as good with a protractor as he is with a shiv 60 degree wedge.  John Strege brings us the news:

“When we kickstarted it again, I thought, ‘If I can be associated with one individual or

brand, who would it be?’” Barry Ehlert, managing partner of the Windmill Golf Group, said. “Phil Mickelson was the first name to come to mind, not just for his design work, but what he brings to golf. He was my first call. 

“What you see on television with Phil is what you get. Everybody likes Phil.

OK, that was no doubt written prior to Sunday...but they've decided to name the club Mickelson National.  And that routing map above goes back some years, but apparently is an 8,000 yard track.  Don't worry though, it's not, you know, set in stone:

Mickelson has not yet seen the property — the course layout shown above, measuring nearly 8,000 yards (the altitude is 3,500 to 4,000 feet), loosely follows the original routing — but is expected to travel to Calgary in the next month to get his first look. Meanwhile, his design team has visited the property on a couple of occasions. 

“We’re not set on 8,000 yards,” Ehlert said. “When Phil gets on site, cit ould end up being 7,600 yards. The original routing ended up being almost 8,000 yards. But whether it’s 7,600, 7,700 or 7.800 yards, whatever it is, first and foremost it will be a course that the members play every day.”

Yes, an 8,000 yard members' course is just the ticket.  

This Week in Australian Radio - Kids, this is why you don't do a radio interview while driving.