Wednesday, April 7, 2021

Midweek Musings - Augusta Edition

The Ocean Course had its way with your humble blogger yesterday, but that's not important now.  It's Masters week, so let's see what the week might hold for us.

A Tradition Unlike Any Other - We're not afraid to tackle the big stories here at Unplayable Lies, so just when you thought it was safe to go to a Masters concession stand:

AUGUSTA, Ga. — There are a few trending phrases at Augusta National this spring.

“Firm and fast.”

“Spieth and Greller.”

“Chicken salad and brioche.”

That’s right: There’s a new sandwich in town.

Breaking news has been replaced by breading news at the 2021 Masters. The menu is expanding. Waistlines are sure to follow. The new sandwich joins the Classic Chicken, the Masters Club, the Egg Salad, the Pimento Cheese, the Ham and Cheese on Rye and the Turkey and Cheese on Wheat. There was chicken salad before, but it was served in a wrap, excluded from the conversation. The brioche bookends mark its call-up to the big leagues.

Given that new menu items appear about as often as the Par-3 champion winning the main event, this will no doubt rock the sports world.  This is a Dylan Dethier offering, and he's not content to merely sandwich blog.... Nope, our Dylan is going for the larger meaning thereof:

The sandwich reminds us of Augusta’s attention to detail. It comes in a green wrapper, like the other food offerings, so that an escaped bit of plastic wouldn’t show up on a TV screen. The trash bags are green, too, as are the patron chairs and the sacks of range balls and tournament-provided masks and the seed that’s used to fill divots. Green tends to blend in around here.

You say attention to detail... I just call them control freaks.  But see if you buy this next bit:

The selection of sandwich suggests Augusta National is open to evolving. For years we’ve been force-fed the idea that egg salad in 85-degree weather is somehow a good idea or that pimento cheese can be the centerpiece of a signature sandwich when in reality pimento cheese doesn’t need to exist, period. The new sandwich immediately joins the upper echelon of Augusta’s concession power rankings. Ham and Cheese on Rye seems suddenly dull by comparison. Change comes slowly to this club, but it’s coming bit by bit — and, yes, bite by bite.

That has to be the liquor talking...

A Walk In the Park -  Rachel Bleier subjects ANGC to her FitBit and concludes that Helen Story picked a good week to take off:

How tough a walk is Augusta National? To find out, we tracked every step, flight and calorie burned

We'll just skip to her conclusions, though she obsessively provides data for each of the holes:

Final Tally

 Total steps: 9,837

Average heart rate: 129 bpm

Total calories: 829

Total miles: 3.71

Total floors: 50

Total Time: 2 hours, 18 minutes

Parting thoughts: I wonder what the record for most sandwiches ever consumed on the grounds of

Augusta is, because I’m about to break it. Could also use a nap. And, man, do I have a new appreciation for the caddies lugging heavy staff bags around this place.

Now, about those elevation changes…

The total floors ascended while walking Augusta National (50!) is the equivalent of climbing to the top of the Washington Monument, or about two-thirds of the way up the 77-floor Chrysler Building, in New York City.

Now imagine doing that while trying to smash drives, hit delicate wedge shots and drain 10-foot sliders between every couple of flights.

In terms of calories burned (829 in total), the average Peloton rider burns 400-700 calories in a 45-minute ride. If running is more your speed, the average person running at 6 miles per hour will burn around 560 calories in an hour. An hour of boxing (800 calories) doesn’t even top the walk at Augusta.

Give us the walk around Augusta any day.

I don't know what the record is either, but with chicken salad in play, it's a whole new ballgame.

And, by the way, math remains hard.  But the scorecard yardage itself is more than four miles, so how she walked the entire course, including from greens to tees, in 3.71 miles will remain a mystery.

Presser Tidbits - Phil gives good presser for sure, at least when he stays on the topic of golf.  But this is Shack's take on a Phil story from yesterday's presser:

Pavlova's Desert: Phil Tells A Spectacular Champions Dinner Story

Spectacular?

Q. Fast-forwarding to tonight's Champions Dinner, how are we feeling about the pigs in a blanket? Are you a fan, or what's up?

PHIL MICKELSON: I'm always open. I've tried a lot of different cuisine over the years. I think it's pretty cool. I remember -- I'll share with you a little funny story from Adam Scott's victory.

He had this wonderful meal, Australian-themed, and out comes dessert, and it's pavlova. It's meringue with some fruit and so forth. And I said, no -- now, you can't Google this stuff because there's no cell phones allowed, right. I said, oh, pavlova, that's inspired by the great Russian ballerina Anna Pavlova who was touring through New Zealand, Australia, and an Australian chef so inspired by her beautiful movement and tutu, she ended up -- he made a dessert after her.
Chairman Payne looked at me like what kind of stuff are you spewing here, you know.

And, no, no, this is true. Zach Johnson looks at me, says, "I've got a hundred dollars that says that's not right."

So everybody is calling me out on my BS. And a lot of times, I am BSing. However, however, my daughter was a dancer, and she wrote a biography on Anna Pavlova, and I made 32 pavlovas for her class when she was a little girl, and I knew this. And I ended up, you know, being right, which is not often, but I was right on that particular moment.

Phil telling a story about how smart Phil is.... Gee, you'd have to be Nostradamus to see that one coming...  

Though my favorite presser for sure is Rory, who seems to have read Golf In The Kingdom after he left Austin on Friday.  Or perhaps it was when he left Ponte Vedra Beach on Friday....

“Yeah, look, I'm trying to view what I'm doing with my golf game on a— I'm trying to see the big picture here,” he said. “I'm obviously focused on this week, but it's bigger than that. It's a journey, right, and it's a journey to try to get back to playing the game the way I know that I can play the game.

“So obviously this week is very important, but I'm still looking beyond that. I'm just at the start of a journey here that I know will get me back to where I want to be.”

I'm not sure, but I think the key concept here is the journey, to which I can only offer this encouragement, Don't Stop Believin'....   Inside joke, maybe someone will get it.

Though perhaps the more interesting word is that "start" bit....  Because in golf terms, he's well into his career... perhaps we should think of the current moment as more of a midlife crisis.

“It’s not as if you can just magically delve back into it and bring it all back to life,” McIlroy said. “I think that golfer going forward is just a little more knowledgeable about what he does and how he swings the club and the movements he needs to make to basically hit three shots, right? Hit a draw, hit a fade, hit one straight. That’s all you need to do in the game of golf. It’s not that hard.”

Well, you're making it look plenty hard.

I see no reason to back off my prior prediction that, if he's not able to win a November Masters with its softer conditions, he'll never complete that career Slam.  

The Art Of The Deal - This item on the machinations surrounding practice round pairings is well worth a look, just another fun aspect of this very special week:

Everyone wants to play a practice round with Freddy Couples (including Tiger Woods, who
usually does at least once during Masters weeks when he is healthy). For Hughes’ first Masters, in 2017, he was milling around near the first tee hoping to find a game when Couples and Mickelson rolled up. “I was like, ‘Oh man, oh man, what should I do?’” says Hughes. He was dying to join them but too starstruck to ask. But Mickelson gave him a nod and Hughes played 9 holes with the two Hall of Famers. “It was incredible,” he says.

Beyond his innate cool, Couples is a popular playing partner because he is liberal in dispensing the course knowledge he’s accrued through the years. “Tiger’s not like that,” says Billy Horschel. “He doesn’t like to share.” For ambitious young players trying to break through, this generosity of spirit is a key factor in whom they try to play practice rounds alongside. “I go with whoever can help me the most out there,” says Jon Rahm. “That’s why I play a lot with Phil and [Jose Maria] Olazabal and other people like that.”

Why am I not surprised?  Of course, most of us would find Billy Ho's Plan B  a curious choice, though at least it comes with an amusing story:

For his two Masters, Horschel picked the brain of 2000 champ Vijay Singh, a similarly spiky personality. Alas, the plan backfired on the 16th hole, when Horschel tried to skip his ball across the pond fronting the green. “It went low and just barely hit the water and then it was like a jet taking off,” says Horschel. “The ball flew right into the people back of the green. Vijay died laughing. He thought it was the most hilarious thing in the world I had to yell Fore! on a par-3 on a skip shot.”

Vijay laughing?  Hey, next he'll tell me that pigs can fly...

Kraken, Released? -  Many folks took pleasure in Bryson's November flameout, though he's certainly not backing down:

Much had been made of how Bryson DeChambeau and all his power would fare at the 2020 Masters in November, fresh off his bludgeoning of Winged Foot. But with a couple of over-cooked draws, one soggy lost ball and not nearly enough birdies, we were all reminded: Augusta National doesn’t lay down for anyone.

DeChambeau is back — five months and another distance-fueled victory later — and the course will play drastically different. His response? To create an even more aggressive approach this time around.

DeChambeau has been most outward with his intentions on the 1st hole, a 455-yard par-4. If it’s playing downwind, he’s going to wallop his new driver up over the trees on the right, and he thinks he’ll reach the front edge of the green. That should scare a couple of people — some of those in the field, some of those power brokers in the distance debate and, most importantly, the patrons and players located up near the green.

He's the hardest working guy out there, so November's failure makes him all the more dangerous this time.  But driving the first green?  

Bryson had this to say at his presser:

Q. Last year there was a lot of talk that, culturally, you were leading a revolution in golf, especially among young fans who are really energized by the way you swing the golf club and all those things. If so, what's the stage of that revolution now?

BRYSON DeCHAMBEAU: I don't know the scope of that answer, either. You guys are giving me tough questions today.

I will say the Drive, Chip & Putt, what we saw with one of the kids imitating Kyle Berkshire, you're already starting to see it with kids. I've had numerous college kids DM me on Instagram and ask me, "How do I get stronger? How do I get faster?" So you're already starting to see it through -- from collegiate level all the way to junior golf level.

I think as time goes on, there's not much more to gain from technology side of golf club manufacturing, building. There are little things we can do, but where the massive gains will be is in athletes. Once you get somebody out here that's a 7-foot-tall human being and they are able to swing a golf club at 145 miles an hour effortlessly, that's when things get a little interesting. That's when I'm going to become obsolete potentially even.

Look, there's still a chipping aspect and there's still a putting aspect to it, but from a driving aspect, that's where the gains will be had, is with these athletes coming out in the future. And it won't stop. There's just no way it will stop.

I think it's good for the game, too. I don't think it's a bad thing you're bringing in and making it more inclusive to everybody when you're doing that. The athletes are the ones that are going to in the end move the needle in any sport you play, and I think that's pretty amazing.

I think he's probably right about future equipment gains, not that much solace is to be found there.  Then again, after the Tour created an internal OB to thwart him at Sawgrass, perhaps he's just being a little more cautious with  sharing his intentions:

And he has a new weapon in his golf bag.

“Definitely what I’ve seen on the driving range and what I’ve seen the last week in practice, there’s some tremendous benefits to it,” DeChambeau said Tuesday at Augusta National.

What he’s been seeing will lead the reigning U.S. Open champion to more than likely go to the first tee Thursday with a new driver – the latest version of Cobra’s RadSpeed driver that hit the U.S. Golf Association’s conforming list this week. Cobra Tour rep Ben Schomin said it has a 5.5-degree face that DeChambeau will adjust to 4.5 degrees, which would provide the PGA Tour’s longest driver even more distance. DeChambeau leads the Tour in driving distance (320.8 yards) and is No. 1 in strokes gained off the tee and strokes gained tee to green.

The new driver, which DeChambeau and Cobra have worked on for several months, has a thicker face for durability – remember, DeChambeau cracked his 4-iron in the final round of the Players Championship on one swing – and a flatter toe radius which will help on mis-hits. The shaft is 46 inches.

The loft might be nominally lower, but he'll still lift it into low Earth orbit...

This bit had me musing, though:

Now he gets his second crack at winning a green jacket since he transformed his already large physique by adding 40-50 pounds.

As I understand things, the club uses the green jackets of similarly-sized members for the winner's green jack ceremony.  So, do they have a member whose jacket will fit Bryson?   

Gratuitous Shark Bashing - The problem with Shark blogging is that the degree of difficulty is so low that it's hard to post a good score.  That said, I'm only human.

Norman has been named lead analyst for the Sirius XM coverage of the Masters, and folks are naturally reacting in predictable ways, by revisiting his Masters heartbreaks and prior announcing gigs.  The reader can make his or her own call as the whether the 1996 Masters or his commentary from Chambers Bay was the greater meltdown, but Shark himself had this curious comment:

But you won’t see Norman schmoozing with the who’s who in golf under the big oak tree this week.

“I’m not that type of person that needs to hang around underneath the tree just to hang around,’’ Norman said. “I don’t need to be seen to be seen.’’

Are you done laughing yet?  No, really, take as much time as you need.  I'll wait....

I could go off on the history here, but the Shark has saved me that trouble.  As you might have heard, Norman recently sold his $60 million Florida estate, which just happens to feature an infinity shower.  And our Shark just had to share his last sunset shower in said infinity shower:

In the photo originally posted on Instagram, the butt cheeks were quite visible.  That post seems to have been taken down, though I\can someone tell me where I go to unsee it?

But clearly our Sharkie isn't the kind of guy that needs to be seen....

Who Ya Got? - Before we get to Sunday stuff, the Golf.com Tour Confidential guys have Thursday-Friday predictions:

Tee times for the 85th Masters are out! (Click here for the complete sheet.) Which first- and second-round grouping is the most intriguing to you?

Dylan Dethier: I’ll start with the obvious answer: The most intriguing group off is the final one. Jordan Spieth, coming off a win and looking to launch the next phase of his career. Collin Morikawa, arguably the game’s best irons player in a week when precision is everything. Cameron Smith, last year’s runner-up, mullet groomed and ready to lead the Aussie charge during a firm, fast week at Augusta.

Josh Sens: Jon Rahm, Xander Schauffele and Rory McIlroy. Two of the best players to never win a biggie, rounded out by a superstar with all kinds of Augusta demons looking to complete the career grand slam. That’s what the kids call Must See TV.

Well, duh!  Who would want to miss the start of Rory's journey?

Nick Piastowski: The Brooks-Bubba-Hovland Thursday morning/Friday afternoon grouping. Koepka (and his knee) will be broadcast on ESPN for his entire back nine on Friday afternoon. How will he look after 36? Will he play another 36? Bubba and Hovland are also a fun watch, too.

Zephyr Melton: Early/late Jason Day, Matthew Wolff and Cameron Champ. If you like bombs, this is the grouping for you. Wolff and Champ can absolutely send it, and Day averages over 300 yards per whack as well. Power is the name of the game in 2021, and this group has plenty of it. It’ll be interesting to see how a firm Augusta National holds up against extreme power.

Jessica Marksbury: I’m totally digging the Hideki-Harris English-Abraham Ancer grouping. Not only do I think Abraham is a very viable sleeper this week, it’s no stretch to envision the first-round leader emerging from this trio.

Ummm, have you been into the 'shrooms, Jess?  Yeah, I guess the first round leader could be one of those three, just not, you know, the Sunday night leader.  Of course, you do have Harris English's animal magnetism... 

Luke Kerr-Dineen: That Mickelson-Fleetwood-Scheffler group looks juicy. Two guys who I could very easily see slipping on a green jacket one day (perhaps one day soon) playing with an all-time Augusta legend in Phil Mickelson. It seems like a stretch to think that Mickelson could contend at the Masters in 2021, but if the greens truly are as firm and fast as those on the ground say, you can never quite count out a short game like Lefty’s.

Alan Bastable: Sign me up for Langer, Zalatoris and English amateur Joe Long. There are few players I more enjoy watching cagily pick apart Augusta than Langer, and no doubt the two first-timers will be observing his actions closely, even if they are 60 yards ahead of him.

For the main event, Golf.com has their winner and sleeper picks, leading with this summary of the betting lines:

Jordan Spieth, at last week’s Valero Texas Open, won for the first time since July of 2017, a span of some 1,300 days.

A good number of golf gamblers are thinking he won’t have to wait quite nearly as long for his next win.

According to oddschecker.com, a site that tracks both odds and which players are the most popular with bettors, Spieth has received 7.6 percent of the bets over the past week to win this week’s Masters, the highest figure among the players in the field at Augusta National. (Following Spieth are Justin Thomas, Dustin Johnson, Rory McIlroy and Lee Westwood.) When looking at odds among sportsbooks, according to oddschecker.com, Johnson, the defending champ, is the favorite — and is now followed by the resurgent Spieth.

I'd actually be interested in a short of most of those names.  I just don't get the sense that DJ is on form, but Lee Westwood?  

Here's just one example, a gent that seems in agreement with your humble blogger:

James Colgan

To-win: Justin Thomas, +1250: In what world are we living that Jordan Spieth has once again usurped Justin Thomas as a Masters betting favorite? Apparently, the present one. Not long ago, there was some question whether JT would be the overall Masters favorite after winning at the Players Championship. If his approach game is as dialed as it was at Sawgrass, he’s going to be in the thick of it on the weekend.

Sleeper pick: Matt Wolff, +10,000. Man … has it really been that long since Matt Wolff was in the final group at Winged Foot? Ah, yes, it has. Wolff is still young, and if he’s fully healthy this week, he could get hot at the right time.

I would sure bet JT before Jordan.... especially with longer odds.  Hey, how about JT as my sleeper pick?

Zephyr Melton

To-win: Scottie Scheffler, +5,500. The guy just oozes with talent. He’s been close several times in his young career (PGA, Match Play), and eventually he’ll break through. Why not this week?

Sleeper pick: Will Zalatoris, +8,000. Has there been any player who has experienced as meteoric a rise as Zalatoris over the past 18 months? He’s already one of the best ballstrikers on Tour, and once he figures out the putting, watch out.

Everybody is on the Will Zalatoris train, or so it seems.  Scheffler is a good pick for a breakthrough win, though maybe too soon after the grind and letdown of the match play?   

Andrew Tursky

To-win: Collin Morikawa, +3,150. Rumor has it that Augusta is already playing quite firm, which could mean golfers who control the ball well will prevail. And no one controls their golf ball better than Collin Morikawa. Although he primarily plays a fade, and Augusta is typically seen as a drawer’s course (for a righty), I think Morikawa’s control off the tee and deadly iron play will keep him from making costly mistakes that will plague others. He’s already got the major monkey off his back, so he’ll be coming into this week with confidence. +3150 feels like great value for Morikawa, too, which is always nice.

As I recall, Jack was a fader of the golf ball... How did that work at Augusta?  Fact is, there are a few tee shots (think Nos. 10, 11 and 13) where a draw is helpful, but in landing balls on #firmandfast greens, nothing works like that butter cut. 

Sleeper pick: Ian Poulter, +15,000. Like my pick to win, Collin Morikawa, Poulter controls his golf ball well. And not only does he hit it on a string, but he’s the grittiest of gritty competitors. Even though he has low odds to win the event, I wouldn’t be shocked to see his name on the leaderboard come Sunday. If he can roll in a few putts at the right time – and we know he can – Poulter could slip on the Green Jacket this week.

Is Mr. Turskey aware that this is a stroke play event?

Here are the ESPN gang's picks for the W:

A lot of players would like to do what Dustin Johnson did in November and get their hands on their first green jacket. Who has the best chance to do it?

Harig: Jon Rahm. In four appearances at the Masters, he already has three top-10s, including a tie for seventh last year. Ranked third in the world, he contends, often, with seven top-7 finishes on the PGA Tour, dating to his victory at the BMW Championship last September. The big question was whether he might skip, as his wife, Kelly, was due with the couple's first child next weekend. That was resolved on Saturday, as Rahm announced that his son was born just after midnight.

Collins: Justin Thomas. The best thing that could've happened to JT after winning the Players Championship was for him to get thumped in the first two matches of the WGC-Dell Technologies Match Play. Why? Because Thomas is a guy who plays great when he's kind of angry. And he left the Match Play angry and ready to grind. His game will be primed for the Masters and his first green jacket.

Schlabach: Am I going to bite on the Xander Schauffele bait again? He has been runner-up eight times since winning the Sentry Tournament of Champions in January 2019. That includes a tie for second at the 2019 Masters, when he led the field with 25 birdies. Schauffele has figured out Augusta National; six of his past eight rounds have been under par. He always shows up on the game's biggest stages, with seven career top-10s in majors. It's just a matter of closing the door and getting it done.

Pietruszkiewicz: There are so many choices, which speaks to the depth right now in golf. There is, as mentioned, Rahm and Thomas. Throw in Rory McIlroy and, if he is healthy enough, Brooks Koepka. There are young guys, like Collin Morikawa, Matthew Wolff and Viktor Hovland. And, of course, you cannot have any conversation about this sport without Bryson DeChambeau. But I'm going in a different direction and saying maybe, just maybe, after so many close calls lately, Lee Westwood gets that big win he's been waiting his entire professional life to get. At age 47, with fiancée Helen Storey on the bag, he's happy. (Storey, though, is off this week with Westwood's son, Sam, alongside.) Westwood posted a pair of runners-up finishes at the Arnold Palmer Invitational and the Players. He knows his way around the place; this is his 20th start. He's been close a few times, finishing second in 2010 and 2016. So ... why not now?

So, the guy that could never close one of these out in his prime will do it in his dotage?  It's a theory...

One last bit from these guys:

What is the biggest surprise of the week?

Harig: Nobody is going to give Rory McIlroy a chance. A lot of frustrating results lately. Hasn't won since the fall of 2019. And just a few weeks before the Masters, he changes coaches? McIlroy brought respected instructor Pete Cowen onto his "performance team'' the week of the Match Play, a move that suggests a more long-term approach. But McIlroy is not that far off. He still drives it great. While his wedge play has given him fits, it also seems like something that can be sorted out with Cowen's help. Too soon? Maybe. But it's not like Rory has been awful. Typically, putting will be the big issue for him.

Putting, for sure.  But not just the putting, as per this from that "journey" piece above:

He has missed the cut in two of his last four stroke-play events and failed to get out of his group at the match play. He ranks 80th in strokes gained/approach for the season and 127th in approach play from 50-125 yards, which is tough for a guy who has 50 to 125 yards into par 4s so often.

Plus, there's that #firmandfast issue.  

Lastly, the Morning Read writers' picks:

There can be only one, so who slips into a green jacket on Sunday?

Hochberg: Justin Thomas has played Augusta five times and gotten better every year dating to 2016: T-39, T-22, T-17, T-12 before a solo fourth in November. There are not really many more places he can move up the leaderboard without winning. He's obviously been figuring out the place little by little. My answer would've been different a month ago, but with his win at the Players Championship, Thomas washed away all the terrible things that befell him earlier in 2021.

Purkey: For the first time since 2002, there will be a back-to-back winner at the Masters. He’ll be wearing the same jacket he won in November.

Van Sickle: I've had a funny feeling all year that Jordan Spieth slowly has been climbing the stairs toward another Masters win, and he took another big step Sunday by winning the Texas Open. He's still spraying his drives? Well, he did that when he won his 2015 Masters. And when he nearly won two others. He fits the profile of the great iron player, great short-gamer and he's got a proven track record. There's also something about Sungjae Im, maybe his super-slow-mo backswing, that makes me think he's a good dark-horse pick. Of course, I once thought Enron and WorldCom were great stock picks, so ...

Vara: He’s not as locked-in as he was this past November, but I’m still siding with D.J. to repeat. It’s a tall task, winning a major two years in a row, especially considering that it took him so long to break through at Augusta, but I have a feeling the floodgates could open with the majors now. Jordan Spieth is going to be a popular choice, and looking at his game, especially after his victory Sunday at the Texas Open, there’s not much to dislike at the moment, but I feel like he has too much steam right now. So many people are on Spieth this week, and the trendy pick rarely pans out at any major.

 I may not know who's gonna win, but I know it's gonna be great.

Not sure when you'll see me next.  Most certainly not on Friday, when we have an early flight home.  Perhaps not until; we wrap it all on Monday morning.  Enjoy the golf and please remember to bet with your head, not over it.

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