Weekend Wrap

I've got some bad news to drop on you folks, so let's make this weekend wrappage special.

Arriverderci Riviera - Wow, that was hard to watch.  It's been a while since I've watched golf and wanted them all to lose....  J.B., especially.  From the invaluable 30-second summary, which is some twenty-five more than appropriate:

Who won: J.B. Holmes (one-under 70, 14 under overall) 

How it happened: Lots of golf was played on Sunday. Thursday’s rain delay pushed the entire tournament back and players returned to the course early on Sunday to finish their

third rounds before teeing off for their final round. Thomas was two holes into his third round and led by one when play was called on Saturday, and when the third round was complete he was at 17 under and leading by four. But a lot changed Sunday afternoon. Thomas bogeyed three of the first five and Holmes took his first solo lead with a birdie on 10 when Thomas made bogey. Thomas birdied 11 to Holmes’s bogey to retake a one-shot lead, but Thomas needed seven putts on the 13th and 14th and made double bogey and bogey to fall two behind Holmes. Thomas birdied 16 to cut the lead to one, but couldn’t make a final birdie to catch Holmes. Thomas signed for a 75.

For the second, I'd have gone with a one-word answer, painfully.

The guys in the booth noticed:

“Here is J.B. Holmes, going through all the maps and scales and typography data that he can find,” said Jim Nantz, setting the stage. 

“The issue I have with that is not that he’s doing that, it’s that he had plenty of time to do that while Justin was getting ready for his shot or Adam was getting ready for his shot,” said on-course reporter Peter Kostis. “And he waited until it was his turn to play to go through his whole routine.”

The irony is priceless....  He just happened to be playing with Adam Scott, the guy that's so frustrated by slow-play that he wants a penalty called on himself, just to get the ball rolling.

 To their credit, the press gang actually asked J.B. about it:

Q. The conditions made things really tough, but there was a lot of discussion on the broadcast and social media about the pace of play today. What were your thoughts about the pace and is that something you were thinking about or working on? 

J.B. HOLMES: Well, you play in 25 mile an hour gusty winds and see how fast you

play when you're playing for the kind of money and the points and everything that we're playing for. The greens are fast, the ball Adam had a putt, he kept setting the ball down and it was rolling.

You can't just get up there and whack it when it's blowing that hard. You've got to read wind and there's a lot of slope on these greens. It's not an easy golf course and you throw in winds like that. On 13 or 14, the par 3, I hit a 5iron and it stays pretty good. He hits a 5iron really good and a gust of wind comes up and he comes up like 15 yards short, and I think he hit it better than I hit mine. It's very tough. Then when you get putting like that, it's just not going to be fast anywhere.

I have a little sympathy for him here, as we all need to understand that in challenging conditions it's gonna take a bit longer.  I'd ask the networks to keep a camera on him as his playing partners are hitting, because I'm pretty sure he isn't doing any of his prep....

Q. Adam Scott said just before that we know J.B.'s a slow player and there was some discussion on the broadcast. Do you think that's a fair assessment? 

J.B. HOLMES: I've been slow in the past. I don't think as slow as I mean, I'm not the fastest player, but I mean, like I said, it was really windy today and we waited a lot early. At the end, I took a little bit longer at the end, but you're talking about getting down to the tournament, you're talking about the last nine holes of the tournament. I mean, I think correct me if I'm wrong, but I think a lot of times the last group of the tournament gets a little bit behind. 

So I was never even close to being on the clock all week. I mean, yeah, when I first got out here I was really slow, but I've sped up quite a bit. Like I said, the conditions made it tougher, too. Sometimes you're waiting for the wind to stop blowing 30 miles an hour. Like I said, I've gotten better. There's times when I'm probably too slow, but it is what it is. I was never on the clock. Nobody never even got a warning. TV wants everything to be real fast all the time.

You no doubt see the issue.... he plays at the pace he prefers because he knows there's no accountability.  It's so easy to say we want the Tour to clamp down, but the enforcement mechanism, which is triggered by the position of the group, not individual players, is pretty terrible.

Shack is the preeminent Rivieratenthologist on the planet, and is back with multiple scatter diagrams:

His basic premise is that no one lays up anymore....  If you watched any of the week's golf, you figured that out for yourself.  The green has become so hard to hold, that the more logical play is to get it as close as possible from the tee.

This is a great venue and event, but the week's installment should be sent down the memory hole ASAP.

Want a proxy for how bad it was?  This event, now to be given elevated status commiserate with Jack and Arnie's events, didn't warrant even a mention in this week's Tour Confidential.  

The Walkback - This is destined to be a case study in Public Relations classes, no?  While we were away, the inevitable capitulation occurred.  It took longer than you'd expect, but that's because our hero was doubling down on stupidity.

Jeff Ritter tried to help, but some guys just won't listen:

Attention, PGA Tour professional: Are you in a media sh*t-storm of your own making? Has your loose tongue, tone deafness or complete lack of understanding of the world

outside the top .0001% tax bracket finally caught up to you? Is the press circling you like buzzards over a wounded antelope, demanding retribution? You’re out of options. There’s only one move left to make: The Apology. Fortunately, we’re here to guide you through this challenging time. Here’s how to do it.

I think Matt's apology successfully met this condition:

3. Take full blame. Do NOT use the phrase, “I’m sorry if I offended anyone.” That will send you right back to the beginning. You do not want to repeat the cycle all over again.

Josh Sens takes a stroll down memory lane with this:

I’m really, really sorry: A definitive ranking of golf’s 13 most memorable apologies

Anybody care to guess what took top honors?  Anyone?  Bueller?

It wasn't even close:

 Good times.

But don't get me started on Suzann Pettersen, who thanks to Tim Rosaforte thinks her sin was not conceding the putt.  Not important now, but still...

You'll no doubt have guessed that the Golf Mag writers have much to say on this juicy topic, appropriate given Mike Bamberger's role in furthering the story:

1. GOLF.com’s Michael Bamberger reported that after Matt Kuchar paid his fill-in caddie at the Mayakoba $5,000 for a victory in November, his looper, David “El Tucan” Ortiz, reached out to Kuchar’s agent, Mark Steinberg, for an additional $50k; Steinberg countered with $15,000, which Ortiz declined. Kuchar addressed the situation at the Genesis Open, saying that, “For a guy who makes $200 a day, a $5,000 week is a really big week.” A day later — and after intense blowback on social media and beyond — Kuchar released a lengthy statement, apologizing for his “out of touch and insensitive” remarks. He also said Ortiz would receive the full total requested. The ever-smiling Kuchar has long been a fan favorite; how much will this fiasco damage his image and reputation? And would you expect it to have an impact on his sponsorship opportunities moving forward?

Dylan Dethier: The catcalls at Riviera this weekend confirmed what we already knew: this is, and will remain, a real thing. We move on fast (Remember what people were saying about Sergio Garcia last week? Or Phil Mickelson at last year’s U.S. Open?) but this will stick as a part of Kuchar’s reputation. No specific word on the Skechers relationship, though. 

Alan Shipnuck: First of all, let’s praise the golf world’s Robin Hood, our own Michael Bamberger, who cracked this thing wide open. Kuchar certainly destroyed a lot of goodwill but the American sports fan has a very short memory – to cite one easy example, Tiger Woods has done a helluva lot worse and he is more beloved than ever. Kuchar will survive this but it was and remains a very bad look.

It sure is...

Jeff Ritter, digital development editor (@Jeff_Ritter): It’ll leave a mark because his first opportunity to make things right was so woefully tone deaf and out of touch. Like Shipnuck mentions, people forgive and forget, but no matter what happens from here, Kooch will never be mentioned with Jack, Arnie, Phil and others who are known for their generosity along with their great playing careers. Instead, Kuchar’s name is stamped on the cheapskates list. Not a great place to be.

Bamberger: We know something about Kuchar we might not have known before: he has the “frugal” gene. In his mind he really did nothing wrong. He couldn’t see it as most people could.

How about a rebuttal from an occasional participant in that TC panel, Kooch's regular caddie John Wood:

“I don’t understand the need to tear down a guy who has spent his career trying to uphold the game and himself to some pretty high standards. Nobody’s perfect. All we can do when a mistake is made is reconsider, apologize and make amends. 

“Matt, his entire family and team have never been anything but generous, inclusive, respectful, and complimentary of me and the job I do for him,” Wood wrote on Twitter Friday night. “I wouldn’t work for someone I didn’t respect, or who didn’t value my opinion. To crucify for one mistake feels wrong.”

On the one hand, Woodie is absolutely right that we should judge his boss and everyone else by their lifetime body of work.  But my problem with this can be found in Matt's initial reaction to the story, specifically this quote:

It wasn't 10% and it wasn't $3,000.

But obviously it was far closer to one of those than the other?

Can you see why I think this is the tell?  Obviously this was early enough to alert him to the fact that it might not be swept under the rug so easily, but he's delighted to use the original mistake about the number to create a false impression that he had given his caddie a nice bonus for their shared success.

In many places that would be considered a lie....  So John, we're up to two mistakes and still counting....

The TC gang had this quasi-interesting follow-up:

2. According to emails shared by Ortiz, Steinberg, who also reps Tiger Woods, could have put an end to this situation by paying El Tucan when he first asked for an additional fee. But he felt that an extra $15,000 was sufficient. How much, if any, culpability should Kuchar’s management team shoulder in how this situation played out?

Dethier: Since they’re supposed to be the failsafe for situations exactly like this one, and 

since Kuchar ended up paying MORE money than they’d initially even been offered, I would say their shoulders should weigh rather heavy after this mess. 

Shipnuck: Almost all of it. Successful athletes live in a weird bubble and can be counted on to usually do the wrong thing when confronted with real-world stuff. The whole reason a guy like Steinberg exists is to navigate this kind of complicated situation. He failed utterly and miserably. 

Bamberger: Agree. Sean Foley likes to say, as others have, that class or whatever word you want to use is what you do for people who cannot do anything for you, not for those who can. His dismissive response to Ortiz’s emails show that he was lockstep with Kuchar, and tone-deaf. Blind to the man’s plight, and rude.

Oh Shippy, you ignorant slut.  Steiny did exactly that which Kooch wanted him to do, keep the riffraff away.....  Yes, he could have seen this coming and headed off Matt, though we'll never know to what extent he tried.

There was this item on comments from the Riviera caddie yard, including this:

“It says a lot about what he thinks of caddies,” said another looper, who caddied for a 2018 Tour winner.

There are caddies and there are Tour caddies, and Matt has shown what he thinks of the former...  I had opined earlier that making Ortiz deal with Steiny was his biggest sin in this, it just showed his contempt for the man.  

I'm not saying this should damn Kooch to his own ring of hell....  But this is entirely on him and he put his tone-deafness on display for us all to see.  It's always a trap when we think we know these guys....

Lucy In The Clear - That TC panel takes on the Lucy Li decision, and I can only suggest that they had extinguished their vitriol on Kooch and Steiny:

3. Lucy Li, 16, will not lose her amateur status for appearing in an Apple ad in January and will instead receive a one-time warning, the USGA announced Thursday. “Ms. Li has neither received, nor will receive in the future, any monetary or non-monetary (e.g., products) compensation for her appearance in the advertisement,” the statement read. Did Li deserve more than a gentle tap on the wrist? 

Dethier: I can’t summon the energy to shout from the rooftops that Li should be punished further — but there’s no doubt the rules surrounding “amateurism” have gotten very weird. Look no further than last week, when famous Tour pro-turned-am-turned pro Gary Nicklaus made his Champions tour debut. 

Shipnuck: I feel the same fatigue. Given all of golf’s ills, this isn’t a big deal. Though the Nicklaus thing bugs me. Amateur status should be like your virginity – once it’s gone, it’s gone forever. 

Bamberger: Yep — it’s a quaint little controversy. Back in the day, it would have been like Arnold taking Tiger out for lunch when he was at Stanford.

OK, I get the fatigue and all, and I'm not making the case for Defcon-5....  That said, I was struck by subterfuge in the USGA's press release...  The bit about Lucy answering a casting call and filming scenes in various recreational activities....  Man, everyone but the USGA took this seriously.

No question that the amateur game needs an overhaul, but a governing organization not enforcing its rules isn't a great look....  Or perhaps, selectively doing so would be more accurate...And I love the bit where they emphasize the absence of consideration....  Hmmm, again, they went to an awful lot of effort to make this work....  I'm guessing there's a wink and nod in here somewhere.

Up for one more from the boys?  Of course you are, silly question....

5. Could Phil Mickelson skip the Players? “It’s not a must-play for me because I’m 48 and I’ve played it 25 times and I’ve already won it,” he told Golf Channel. “If I were young and early in my career, I would say yes because I think it’s as close to a major as it can get. But it’s not the best course for me.” What sort of impact would Mickelson staying home have on the reputation of an event that has long positioned itself as the “fifth major”? 

Shipnuck: None, because I’ve devoted my life to debunking the Fifth Major nonsense and hardly need Phil to buttress the crusade. But I do appreciate his support. 

Dethier: I’m a newer recruit to Shippy’s cause but have thrown myself wholly behind it. There are FOUR MAJORS. FOUR. Stop this nonsense. 

Bamberger: Completely agree. It’s an important interesting event. March will be better for it. It is not remotely the “fifth” major and there are four majors and in a four-bedroom house nobody is bunking up here, as SI once tried to get me to do with John Garrity, in an Augusta rental. I found my own digs. Augusta is a major. The two Opens, Hagen’s PGA— majors. You gonna talk about TPC Sawgrass with THAT CROWD. See Dylan, above. 

Ritter: The Players is a fun event but the fifth major thing has always been overblown. If Phil skips it, it’ll be a big story all the way until Thursday morning of tournament week, but in the end, the story will always be about the competition. Hey, that’s one thing the Players has in common with the actual majors.

I think Shippy has to take the heat for driving that bus into a ditch....  Yes, The Players is most certainly The Fifth of Four™, so they've got that going for them.

But isn't the more interesting question what a guy like Phil, whose benefited greatly from the Tour, owes back?  Should he show up just to support the Tour?  I'm not sure where I come down and it's an issue we see more often as relates to The Euro Tour, but color me surprised that none of the writers wanted to take it on.  Must be that fatigue noted above...

Schedule Notes - Tomorrow is a travel day, but not in the ordinary seasonal meaning of that term.  The bride and I are heading to The People's Republic of Portland (Oregon, not Maine) to pay homage to Lucy Stadtler, our new grand-niece.  There will be no blogging from the PRP, and there are further complications when we arrive in Utah on Friday.

I know you'll get through the week with no issues, likely the larger concern is that I won't.  I'll make it all up to you on the other side.